I'll try not to drip feed but I may forget details.
So ex had affairs in the UK we had relocated to the other side of the world when this bombshell was dropped. I rent through the usual bollocks of counselling etc.
Asked on here many times should we stay in Australia or go back to the uk and decided for me - not necessarily the kids even - I wanted permanent residency in Australia to give me options. I will get that this year, the year after I get citizenship and then we will return to the uk - the kids can make their own minds where they want to live at 18 and I feel I've done my bit.
In the middle of all this DH - you can work out what that stands for - literally couldn't get a job in Perth, we relocAted because he couldn't get a job in England either - so he literally packed up and moved 5 hours by plane away. He left me with 4 kids, not a cent to my name, about to be thrown out of our rental for non payment of rent, no job, no visa ... Then to add insult to injury got a court order preventing me from leaving Australia.
So now after Christmas he plans to visit and have the children for three weeks. Except he has no money and nowhere to stay so he thinks he's staying at my house with the kids. I will go to work and he will basically take the kids out for the day I guess - there is no way he's having my car - goodness knows where the money for that is coming from.
I'm scared to say no because he currently pays 50/50 of my Childcare on top of maintaince - it's fuck all frankly - but I need it until 18th December. But I don't want him in my house. He's hit me in front of the kids - I have hit him back, called me a slag, told the kids I don't want them when I forced him to look after his own child. Moving away was the best thing he did but equally I haven't had a break in over a year. Kids haven't seen him in 7 months ... You know who'll be the bad guy if I say no.