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Relationships

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Is the standard financial split 50/50?

12 replies

Somethingtodo · 12/10/2014 22:10

We have 4 kids if we separate will the house be sold and the equity split 50/50? We both have similar pension pots. We have both worked full time and earned the same throughout (although I am out of work at the moment but will be back at work within the next 6 months). I would have the kids and imagine and every other weekend over night and one weekday evening arrangement,

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WellWhoKnew · 12/10/2014 22:33

Highly unlikely. The resident parent will most like get a 70/30 or 60/40 split BUT it all depends on your individual situation. The starting point is 50/50 but the welfare of the children is paramount, so if it's possible for them to remain in the same house and your STBXH to rehouse elsewhere then it's something you might want to consider.

However, a good solicitor will tell you exactly what to expect as everyone's situation is different, and it all depends on earnings, other assets, ages of children, length of marriage & co-habitation etc.

You can still DIY your divorce, but do get regular solicitor input.

Somethingtodo · 13/10/2014 00:03

Thanks - I will be resident parent, there are no other assets - we have been together 30 years, married 20, cohab 5 yrs before that, kids 8, 13, 14, 16. Similar FT job/salary - but I am out of work atm.

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WellWhoKnew · 13/10/2014 00:29

Right-o. You'll be treated as having a relationship of 25 years, and you will require support until your children reach 18 - this can be calculated.

The best direction I can send you in is to read 'Gordon and Slater: Family Law Made Simple' which explains the millions different ways that you can approach a divorce. No divorce is identical - so just because 'er at No. 42 took him to the cleaners (not true!) whereas 'him at No. 12 was left brassic (not true) are mere stories. All marriages are unique in their own way - so all financial settlements and childcare arrangements are unique.

Good luck with it. It's an absolutely horrible process but it does end.

Somethingtodo · 13/10/2014 00:40

Thanks will do that - main thing is we will not be able to stay in house as cant afford to buy out STBXH.

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WellWhoKnew · 13/10/2014 03:06

Hang on - I have no idea what house you live in, and just because you can't afford to buy him out right now, doesn't mean you can't stay in the FMH (former marital home).

Speak to a solicitor - they will explain the law to you. As much as women and men have equal rights, divorce law does not stipulate gender - it utterly priorities the rights of the children.

In divorce, the rights of the children are uppermost.

You and your STBXH have to adjust to that. (I'm not making an accusation here but...)

CogitoErgoSometimes · 13/10/2014 07:38

I think you should talk to a solicitor rather than make assumptions. Children's welfare is important but so is the welfare of the adults. Your ex will need to be able to set up home solo and it should ideally be somewhere that he can accommodate the children when he is sharing the parenting. If he can't afford that and finance the family home/maintenance at the same time, then that wouldn't be a fair solution.

springalong · 13/10/2014 09:26

Also any planning and preparation for cohab counts as well to length of relationship (eg saving for deposit). Your relationship is clearly a long one so this helps you as well for periodic payments.

Somethingtodo · 13/10/2014 10:04

WellWhoKnew - your last sentence is a too cryptic for me - would you mind explaining. Cogito - yes that is the situation - I am in no position to buy him out, there are no other assets, so selling the house so that both parents have a roof over their heads to house the children would be necessary.

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 13/10/2014 10:19

Children are not ring-fenced 100%, complete with large family home, whilst the NRP lives in one room somewhere. That might be a voluntary arrangement that works for some couples but it is not one that a court would demand. Children are prioritised but not to the extent that one or other of the parents is making unreasonable sacrifices.

WellWhoKnew · 13/10/2014 11:41

Sorry. Divorce Law is very complex so any assumptions are just that, it depends on what you can agree between yourselves, and failing that, what your solicitors agree on your behalf. This all boils down to the individual circumstances of your marriage.

Cog is right - a father will not be living in one room, whilst the wife swans about the mansion. However how you do divide the assets, consideration will be given to:

Yours and his "Financial Needs" going forwards. With four children, you may already live in a five-bedroom house. You may not. But their housing, and yours as a primary carer will be the first consideration. Whatever you have now, is likely to be retained by you until the children grow up. So any equity he claims in the house, may well have to sit there, until such a time that you can reasonable afford to sell it and buy a one/two bedroomed home, this is usually when the child reaches 18.

Also taken into consideration is "compensation" - so if you have scarified your career, for example, whilst he has accelerated his by virtue of becoming a SAHM, then this will be factored in. Compensation does not mean you get half of his income going forward at all, but again, it does explain why every divorce is unique.

If you have the children full time and have to pay for childcare in order to work full time, then he may have more disposable income be comparison. On the other hand, if he cannot raise enough to obtain a mortgage, then he will rent and more of his disposable income will be used up. So the law seeks to allocate 'fairness' given your individual situation.

Thirdly "sharing" together you had a way of life (and the longer you were married, the more it was your way of life). That means that when the marriage ends, both parties have to adjust to a new way of life, depending on what can be afforded.

So the assumption that it's just a 50/50 split of the assets and that's fair, is not Divorce Law at all. It's the principles above that explain why Heather Mills got 16million on her divorce after just a few years of marriage to a man who was estimated to be worth 444million. So nowhere near the 50/50 split, however, you may judge it was fair because she put up with Paul McCartney's warbling for a few years (thus the compensation aspect!). The media, if I remember rightly, seemed to think "she'd done very well out of her marriage". She didn't do that well really - litigants in person generally don't when faced with the skilled expertise of London's top barristers.

The law only seeks 'fairness', then any assumptions a first time divorcee has is likely to be media-led and incorrect. I think is the point I tactlessly was trying to make.

Somethingtodo · 13/10/2014 12:13

Thanks for explaining! I am happy to split our property asset 50/50. Last thing I want is my STBXH and children sharing their time together in lesser accommodation. The ages of my older sons will mean that they might choose to spend more time with their Dad. Might need to look at additional contribution from him for any additional costs for the additional time I have them.

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springalong · 13/10/2014 20:02

If you can agree a sharing of assets that genuinely works well for all of you then that is fantastic. But do get independent advice first :)

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