DH and I have the same kind of argument every week. He is a highly inflammatory (he would say "sensitive") person. He has a group of very loyal friends who have been solid for decades who he never argues with, but he really cannot let a day pass without having a huge bust up with someone - whether it's a friend, someone he's doing business with, or just someone he meets in the street.
What's different about this is that things I do don't really bother him at all. He gets upset mainly over external circumstances; someone was rude to him, his job's not going well, people are "deliberately" 
causing problems in the smooth running of his life. He expects me to agree completely that so-and-so is against him, that his situation is very unfair, that X or Y person is horrible. If I do and (i only do if I think that he does have a point,) he develops this "us against the world" mentality and wants to keep talking about it and fuming about it, sending abusive emails and not letting it go and updating me on what's happening.
If I don't, or I calmly point out the facts of the situation or how he should see it differently, he turns on me and accuses me of being disloyal, "just like everyone else." He can rant for hours - days even - about how it has been revealed to him that he has a traitor in his own house i.e.. me. That married couples should put each other first before everyone else. The anger and rowing is exhausting for me. The more I try to speak rationally or objectively about what I perceive to have happened (the situation that upset him and the resulting fall out between the two of us) the worse it gets, he "cannot believe" I am trying to rationalise something so blatantly abusive towards him.
He then tells me that I am colluding in the abuse of him by saying that the other person has a point and I get more verbal tirades about my character.
Sometimes I just let it go, sometimes I capitulate and agree with him that yes so and so is indeed a bastard and deserves to go to jail/be retaliated against, and most of the time, we both run out of steam and stamina after a period of days and call a truce, exhausted.
He never takes any of his plans to fruition. Ie, he never comes through on the threats he makes to me about how he is going to get revenge on others. The plan dies out, he gets distracted by something else, or he just pulls out of the morose mood he was in.
This is an example, but a really good one of what happens:
A year ago he went into a family-run interiors shop and struck a deal with the father about how much he would pay for 8 items. The next day he called to pay for and pick up the items and the daughter was behind the till. The father had not left a note to tell her he'd struck a deal with my DH, and the daughter refused to sell DH the items at the same price. DH lost it, shouted at her, told her to go to hell, stormed out, sent them abusive emails. He came home and when I pointed out it could simply have been a misunderstanding, turned on me and started telling me that he was going to go in the night and smash all their windows in and set it on fire. I said now come on DH, that's ridiculous, and he lost it with me even more.
He didn't do any of the things he threatened. In the end, the father rang, DH calmed down, he paid the price of the deal and we have the stuff in our house.
He has said that when he was a teenager he was told by teachers that they suspected him of being on the autistic spectrum, but he refused to take the test. He said the reason that they said that is that he reacted badly whenever plans went wrong or circumstances were changed even slightly.
I don't know what it is. Autism? Or just straightforward EA?