I’d like some advice for my friend, who is in an emotionally, financially and on one occasion, physically, abusive marriage.
She is from eastern Europe and her husband is from the Middle East but has British citizenship. Their 1 year old son has a British passport. They live in the same apartment block as me and I’ve known him cordially for 10 years, her for about a year and I speak her language (albeit rustily)
I felt for some time she was reaching out more to me, and I’d have her over for dinner, drinks (he’s muslim, she is not) etc.
He has a high paid financial job and works in Europe and comes back to visit once every 3 weeks or so. He has installed his mother in law (no English) in the flat.
She came to me the other day to say he has ordered her back to her country and has bought her a ticket and that he is keeping the son. He said to me a few days before that he was taking a job in the middle east. Putting two and two together I guess he wants her out of the picture and will take the boy there. There has previously been issues with other women (he was Sharia married at the same time as legally marrying my friend) and there is bank statement evidence that he spends 1-2 days in a UK town withdrawing large sums of money before arriving at the flat each time he returns to the UK.
She’s unburdened herself and the highlights are:
He hit her while holding her 1-month old when she said she was leaving. He trashed her room and took away her marriage certificate. He has his room locked and put it there. He and the mother have a key.
He has taken her bank card away, having previously shopped online for food but given her only 100 pounds a month for her. He has now stopped this
He has cut off her internet
He has Skyped her, telling his son she is a bad mother in his language and sent abusive texts.
He has told her she has no rights and will never see her son again.
MIL, who has shown no interest has started taking the boy out for short trips without telling her (like she’s in the shower and found him gone..) It is as if they are preparing the boy (who is very attached to mother) for life without her.
I have had the police over to mine to get her to fill out a report detailed the previous abuse so it is logged. I am taking her to a lawyer (very expensive but will use the free hour) to discuss her options.
Is there anything else I should do? Call Women’s Aid? In a way she shouldn’t have to relinquish the family home but I am worried for her and the son when he comes back next week.
I am also worried he will go mental at me for helping her. I can’t really turn a blind eye to this though.