My dh works 8-5 Monday to Friday. For the past year I have been psychotically depressed, plus I have had a lot of blood problem I am dangerously deficient in b12 and folic acid and iron. I als o have stomach issues making in physically agony to stand I am waiting for colonoscopy and endoscopy.
We have three dc one severe autism, one speech delay and one as and adhd. I have been severely struggling I self harmed regularly and severely. I made two suicide attempts requiring hospital treatment.
I have been finding things to hard. I can care for dc but I cannot clean. At least until recently when I got better.
My family have given no help or support not even visiting me in hospital after my suicide attempts.
I found I just couldn't do everything anymore. So I stopped cleaning while still seeing to dc needs. This has meant dh had to take over cleaning and cooking. He has not done a good job of it and now I feel better in the last two days I manged to get 12 black bags of crap in the bin.
My question is as I have been living in a shit hole while I'll because dh does the bare minimum (if you can call it that) throughout my illness.
I am confused a part of me feels he could of done more as I regularly saw him spend two hours a night playing games when house was still messy and a weeknight. About 6 hours on a weekend. I am just confused about whether I am expecting to much.
It was the same everytime I have had a baby within three days I took over housework being unable to live with his half a job anymore.
So I really don't know should I have expected more or am I underestimating how hard he has it?
Please be gentile I am perfectly willing to be told I expect too much but can it be done gently very vulnerable and confused right now.