All I want is an injunction against my DS's 'dad'

[SickAndScaredOfThisHarassment]

That's it really. :(

Since 2011 when I fell pregnant and he grabbed my arms and threw me to the floor and told me I wasn't ready to have a child as I was a stupid young girl. He made me tell him where I was going at what times, I wasn't allowed to walk anywhere in case I 'wondered off and got hurt' so he would drive me. I finally told him no and I wanted nothing to do with him at 5 weeks when he refused to come to my DS's antenatal appointment because he was "busy drinking and he didn't want it anyway"

He would sit outside my house looking into the windows, harass me every day, he knew my every move no matter what and in Dec 11 when my grandfather died he emailed me saying "ha ha your grandfather died :)" He swore to make my life hell and if that meant him having something to do with that "shitty child" then he would drag me through court.

Since then the police have been out time after time again, he even got his friends to follow me and he'd text me telling me what he was wearing, where I was going etc. He's even been issued a no contact order for my DS as he wouldn't even say hello to him in contact and would constantly insist I would be in the room.

Since then he's tried to re-register my son, tell people on facebook where I live, what car I drive etc, he even got his friends to move in down the road from me. He was served with a Harassment Warning Notice and I've shut down every email address, changed my phone numbers constantly and moved.

Yet despite me only telling three people who don't know him where I was going (area not road name etc) on the day I moved in he got his friends to contact my neighbours (related) so they would let me know that he knew where I was, he knew when I moved, from where to where. I haven't been here 4 weeks and I'm back to being scared and distressed and the police have said they can't do a thing despite 3 years of harassment and abuse.

He even took to facebook to tell everyone on his "fathers rights group" that "If she thinks she can move house without me knowing, she's wrong. I know lots of people"

I'm sick to death with it, every car that comes past I'm scared it's him coming to my house, I moved so he wouldn't find me and here he has despite me moving 4 times in 3 years he's found me.

I've no doubt I've got anxiety from the DV and EA (past doctor has said so) So I need to go back and see my new GP to log it again. I'm just tired of this fight with him, I don't know why I carry on half the time.

Oh god, you poor thing. That sounds horrific.

Have you listed every single incident and given it to the police?

Have you contacted the police each time an incident occurs?

Do you have evidence of his facebook activity?

Why have the police said that they can't do anything?

You could apply for a non-molestation order. Speak to your local Citizens Advice or a solicitor. There's some good information on this website:www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-violence-articles.asp?section=00010001002200230001&itemid=1261
I really hope your situation improves and this evil man is kept away from you and your Ds. Good luck xx

I'm not impressed with the police's response. You're being stalked and intimidated, it's an offence and they should be taking it much more seriously, I think you need more agencies on your side and to keep pushing the police to act. Make a real nuisance of yourself if you have to. If you speak to Women's Aid 0808 2000247 they may be able to give you more advice or recommend a lawyer.

Have you considered a refuge?

He must be getting his info from somewhere...have you got a computer or phone that was in use back then? I suspect he is tracking you through some form of keylogger or something.

My solicitor won't even look to apply for a non-molestation order due to the fact he does something and the police go round and he's given a verbal caution, he waits a couple of months and starts again it's been the same pattern for 3 years and each time they do the same thing.

And because he leaves such long gaps my solicitor said nothing will be granted for me I've changed phones and computers. It was only in court I learned he's nearly 40 and I'm now only just over 20.

I can't go to a refuge as I'm in my own home now and he hasn't come by. I never even lived with him :( I'm just at a loss as to what to do :(

Which section of the police are going round giving him cautions? What I mean is, have you spoken to the DV team specifically, told them the full story and asked for advice? Or are you calling 999 and getting random bobbies? Three years of intimidation is extremely serious. Has anyone advised you to keep a diary of incidents, for example?

I was ringing 101, they'd come round and take a statement and then go round and talk to him and consider the case close. Never rang 999.

Only now have I been advised to keep a log after the officer told me he wants to draw a line under the harassment warning notice and start again! I just want to give up!

Be careful of who you give your details too it should only be absolutely those that need to know. My aunts evil ex continuously found her through a friend of a friend passing on details because she believed the whole 'she's hiding my kid from me' BS.

Prepare a DIY non mol.

Simple form to fill in.

More complicated is the accompanying statement, look up tips on how to arrange it and what to say in each paragraph. State the conditions that you want ie no contact, not to come to your steer if poss, within 100 yards of you if you can get that. Breach of these orders is arrest able.

When do,pledge, print off four copies. Local court, hand in, ask for date to be sent to both parties.

On that date, go with a friend and ask the clerk to put you somewhere safe.

Then make your case to the judge and hopefully get a non mol.

Little - like I said I told 3 people my dad who moved me, my best friend and my sister all never told a soul as I never told the address too and he found out the day I moved!!! I hadn't told anyone where the address was and he knew!!!

I've already been told I won't get a non-mol order because it's done over months then he's quite for months then he starts again. Plus what he's doing now is getting his friend who is related to my neighbour to basically spy on me

My point is Who did they tell? The loose tounge my aunt knew swore blind she never told anyone because of her she moved at least 5 times in 3 years.

Then the neighbour can be prosecuted too, I know this can be a legal nightmare my ex stalked me (using PIs too) for years there was little I could do because he was never violent. These types want to grind you down but the only way you'll get peace is to get good legal advice or accept he knows where you live and stand your ground.

Nobody! They don't know any mutual friends I don't even know his friends, and the people I told don't live near him!

Any chance he doesn't actually know where you are, but is trying to frighten you by saying he does?

I think you should contact Women's Aid and garner some professional support. They could help you find a decent solicitor who can issue a non-mol - I have no idea why you wouldn't be able to under your circumstances.

Know he does, he's tried adding my neighbours on Facebook and tried coming out there house