DH ran up a balance on his work credit card

[tinyshinyanddon]

I don't even know where to start with this: I am so angry.

I look after all our finances: I took it over a few years ago after noticing that DH didn't keep on top of things like I would: he would get the occasional late fee and he signed up for free trials and didn't cancel in time etc.

DH has a work credit card: a card in his name to be used for work purchases. He files expenses to claim the money back - that is deposited in our joint account. He is responsible for paying the balance off the credit card each month. He works for a large, well recognized company. I don't have access to statements - it's very much "his thing for work".

I had assumed that he was keeping on top of it but yesterday a letter came in from that bank which I opened. The account was past due and there would be a late fee. That's when I noticed that he is carrying a balance of $1000 currently. I asked him for all the statements and claims and I've been going through everything.

Over the last year he's paid over $250 in late fees/interest. The highest balance was $1500, now it's $1000. He says he was "hoping it would just go away". He says he has about $200 still to claim back but that still leaves us needing $800.

Money has been really tight for us these last few years. I shop for deals and use coupons all the time. I make things to try and save money. I sell things online (on gumtree/craigslist) that we no longer use: mainly baby stuff. I run a tight ship and DHs behavior is just such a slap in the face. I have lost all trust in him and I seriously question his judgement. I don't know what to do - how can I stop this happening again?

I have asked to see ALL statements when they come in but I am still so worried about his behavior. How could he think it was OK to do that while I groveled around saving here and there trying to make a difference. I have considered cutting up the card but that could get him into trouble with his boss. Also thought about writing to his boss explaining that this method of making purchases for the company is not working and there must be a better way where we don't have to be out of pocket and then wait for the expense claim to come in. Any thoughts?

I have a work credit card exactly as you describe.

As someone said upthread, it's actually a personal credit card although the terms are negotiated through my firm and are marginally preferential as a result. I am responsible for paying off the balance and am allowed to use it for non-work purchases; I have to submit a claim for work purchases before my firm will reimburse them (although my firm is pretty good at reimbursing me within a week of a valid, receipt supported claim signed off by my boss, so I am always reimbursed before my credit card bill is due).

From what you've described, your DH has claimed for everything he's entitled to claim (arguably tips notwithstanding - I always arrange work lunches/dinners at restaurants that have already added a discretionary service charge to the bill for exactly that reason - it's too hard to explain why a restaurant bill shows £100 but my CC bill was for £110).

You as a family have received the right amount of cash from his employer but he has not used the cash to pay off his balance. Worse, he had also accrued interest and penalties as well.

I too would be livid with him. I don't think he's taking it seriously.

Practical steps: pay the card balance off from savings so interest and charges stop.

Next, your family has presumably spent the money that should have gone on paying off his company CC on other things. How would you have coped without the extra? Because $800 or whatever it is is a lot when you're using coupons and sourcing deals for everything. And I'm worried that without that $800 your family would have struggled.

Does he have to use the company CC for work purchases? I do have to use mine to book hotels and flights, but I can use any card or even cash for other expenses. If he doesn't have to have a company CC then cut it up. If he does have to have a company CC then tell him to get a copy of his firm's policies for its use so you know exactly where you stand.

You then have a choice. Do you want to keep controlling all of you family finances? If you do then he has to hand over monthly CC statements to you. If you don't then you need to disentangle your finances from his and let him sink or swim.

I too would be livid. Do the late payments affect his credit history?

Did he claim the expenses? What did he spend the expenses money on? I'm wondering if he has a spending problem. If 2 x months wages are 10k does he feel that he earns a lot so he deserves to spend a lot? (I see this in my job, often leading to debt).

I couldn't live with a man-baby who was not able to handle his own finances. Presumably some of these guys are in charge of budgets at work, so they CAN handle money if necessary. They just choose not to and leave mummy to clear up the mess.

Ok I get the credit card situation now

Has he lost any receipts he might have needed to reclaim some of the balance?

This is fairly routine administrative stuff related to his job. If he genuinely finds it too difficult to manage he needs to discuss that with his employer

I agree with the PP who said pay it off from savings if you can now to avoid more charges. The HE has to work out how your savings will be replenished. And it has to be him who is making the sacrifices - selling his own stuff, cutting back on non-essentials for him, etc

As money tight HE needs to sell some of HIS things whether he uses them or not to get the card cleared ASAP, if he can not find the receipts so he can claim it back.

But you have to decide out where your point no return, I don't believe an adult can continue to believe the 'money fairies' will sort it out, he doesn't do it because he doesn't want too. But sooner or later it will be picked up by his company and he could be sacked for gross misconduct or even fraud as he is not using the company credit card as intended.

I have a card that I use exclusively for company expenses. I keep the receipts, get the money, use the money to pay off the card... job done. Your DH needs to do that and I would suggest your first step is that the reimbursement money should go in a separate account and not the joint account. That way the refunds, the spending and the CC are all his responsibility and they do not impact on family finances.

Knowing your DH is ignorant/irresponsible and then finding out he's quite happy being is never a good way to increase attraction or respect. Not surprised you're angry.

This is for him to resolve but separate the finances. How he pays the shortfall back is his problem.

He hasn't necessarily used the card for personal purchases or failed to submit his receipts. He could just have been late getting his receipts in one month, got a late fee and interest, not claimed for that and then it all keeps spiralling.

What he ought to do, is ssit down, go through all the statements since the last zero balance, work out what he has spent and what he has paid for and then what the monies still owing are (i.e. are they just late fees and interest). Obviously he will have to pay for anything personal he's bought if he's bought anything, but he may be able to put in a claim for late fees and interest, especially if he has those because the receipts didn't come in on time for him to claim. I don't know if they are obliged to pay up though. I managed some consultants in the US (which I'm guessing is where you live given the time your posting and the $s) once where we had that kind of set up and one of them got into the same sort of situation. The company paid up but I was on his case every month to get his expenses in on time. He was good at the technical part of his job so we weren't too put out (wasn't as much money either though) but he certainly took a bit of a knock on his reputation and lost some of his political clout internally.

Agree with the point about the timing of spending vs reimbursement being a cause of incurring interest. Late fees shouldn't happen however. Good way to avoid those is to set up a direct debit to pay the bill automatically rather than rely on remembering.

BTW My organisation gave me a £1000 cash advance at the start so that I wasn't out of pocket before the reimbursement payments started coming in. If I leave the company ever I will have to pay it back.

The OP said upthread that he's submitted all the claims supported by receipts, and has been reimbursed on a timely basis.

He just then failed somehow to use the reimbursed cash to pay off his credit card.

Then, because the cash wasn't apparently earmarked for anything, it got spent in the normal course of the family's purchases.

I agree with Cogito - a separate account for his company credit card alone - and he deals with it if he screws it up.

Cinnabar OP doesn't say the company reimburses in a timely manner, she says the company can be late reimbursing and she has assumed in the past that payments coming in were reimbursing a bill already paid off. I would not be happy subsidizing the company like that for any significant amount and if money was tight might need them to pay the fees and interest if I had got all my receipts in on time but had not had the money back to pay off the card. Though OP also makes it clear her DH has not actually been on top of either claiming his expenses or paying off the bill once the money was in, so a request to get fees etc. paid would be hard to make. And if one of the DH's colleagues had to refuse to come in for two weeks in order to get them to expidite a claim I guess they may have a less than generous approach.

Separate account deifintely sounds like a good idea. But that by itself won't stop him running up late fees and interest, though it will at least safeguard the reimbursements for the company. Especially if he has a head in the sand "thought it would all go away" attitude about it. OP is there a household expense that is mainly a luxury for his benefit (stereotypical sports channel on cable or something) that could be the thing cut to replenish the savings?

I feel slightly out of step with the other posters here.

I agree that your DH sounds poor with money, but I'm not sure that treating him like a naughty child is the way to go. You said he got a sternly worded email from you when he got a late fee and also that you are thinking of writing to his boss.

I know what he has done is serious and I know how upsetting it is to have a partner who is careless with money when you feel you are scrimping for any penny, I really do. However when you read some of the stuff going on here I feel that if he is a good DH and DF in other ways, whilst this is not a good thing to have happened, it needn't be the end of the world and I have some sympathy for him working away in the summer whilst the family is on holiday for 3 weeks.

How does he feel about you having full responsibility with the money? Can you both sit down and try to agree a strategy going forward for handling this?

As things are so tight is there any way that the family finances can be improved. Are you working?

that is v annoying
we are out of pocket for expenses dh never claims for or cant manage to get the paperwork for
he doesnt take this sloppy approach to his actual job
i try to just not know anything about it as otherwise i am annoyed
separate account for work money?

He's not been abusing the system - he's just forgotten that crucial step of PAYING OFF THE FCKING CARD when the bill comes in.*

There can be a long delay getting the expenses paid....So when I saw a deposit from his company I assumed he had already paid that amount off the CC bill

Bad choice of word on my part to say the firm paid expenses in a timely fashion. All I meant was - the expenses were claimed and had them repaid already. No more money forthcoming from the company.

I have to ask this - who told OP there can be long delays? The DH perhaps?

This thread has just reminded me I haven't submitted my September expenses! (Only for £30, and doing it Monday is hardly a big delay.)

I have a lot of sympathy, since I personally hate having to claim expenses, to the extent that if i ever won the lottery, id probably keep on working but never, ever bother to claim expenses. Like Bear, though, its one of those things that just has to be done, unless you have the luxury of a PA to sort it for you.

It strikes me as fishy, though, that while OP has jumped in and runs a tight ship across their lives, DP has now made a big mess of the one area of finance that is under the other's control.

Not sure what it means, but I would certainly want DP to be taking responsibility and working out the plan. If they are reading a book now, to have them at least commit to when they are going to get it sorted.

43percentburn yes I think it will affect his credit score. His score is actually rather good (not as high as mine) but this will bring it down.

cinnabar there are delays - it depends on the expense type. Claiming per diems when on training are the worst. Buying actual supplies at a store are easier (DHs expenses are mostly this type).

I collated the statements with deposits this morning. Over the last year he spend $900 that I cannot collate with a reimbursement deposit. There are 2 big items (total $400) that may have been deposited before the CC bill came in (need to call the bank to access the statements more than 1 year old). But that's still $500 my family is out of pocket. That's DHs job for the day...going through the list.

What annoys me is there are some dumb things on the list: $10 donation to a charity? Trips to various stores with small ($50) purchases (definitely work related)? There's also a recurring charge for a toll road - that will be my family paying for the work vehicles running between stations then? I just snuck a look and he has marked a few things as "to be claimed" so let's see what he comes up with.

I am going to ensure I see all CC statements and all expense claims each pay period from now on. But I feel like a nanny doing this and feel it does not address the root of the problem.