What would you do?

[Inlimbo1982]

What would you do if you felt utterly lost and helpless. Suffer from anxiety and agrophpbia and rely on my husband , travel, basics, but you feel upset about finances ( he has own business) if you felt resentful because you feel left out of choices and things going on behind your back that you have no control over but at the same time can't do a thing because I don't work due to problems and anything you do do is limited in his company . What happens if you feel lied to and feel the trust has gone between both people but you have noone to help in life other than your partner who you rely or relied on. Would you go or would you stay if you felt it was near impossible to cope alone due to anxiety? But resent your husbAnd. I feel lost and I just feel paralysed to do anything.

Are you getting any professional help with your anxiety?

No but have in the past .

I think the answer here depends very much on your current state on mental health.

I have issues in this respect too and it runs in cycles. The key thing for me is that I realise that my strength of feelings change within that cycle and that whilst I have every reason to be upset/disappointed/angry etc, those feelings were magnified and had I acted on them by leaving, I'd have regretted it.

Have you paid a return visit to your GP? Do you feel you need to?

Whatever you need to do, you need to be sure as you can be that your feelings are LTB worthy. I realise that's incredibly easy for me to write and impossible to judge if you don't trust your own instincts and health.

Do you have a friend or relation that you trust has your best interests at)3-4/, that knows you both that you can ask this question to? I think you need advice, but perhaps better coming from someone who knows your situation.

That should be .... At heart .....

Thanks. No I don't have anyone. We don't have friends as we became the couple that spent all there time together so I don't have any close friends now . I'm alone really other than my dog. She's lovely . I wish she could talk to me. The one person who always gave good advice was my gran but she died . I sound like such a tragic case.

I could ask my mum but she can't be trusted to give advice that would be the best for me. Ive come from a bad background. I think some on here refer to toxic and narccism. It's like that with my side of the family, I just feel so upset that i have noone .

I think you need to try and talk in RL with someone. Your GP? A nurse at the surgery? They actually do "talking" appts these days. This might or might not result in you being referred, if you agreed, for counselling of some kind. This might offer you techniques to deal a little better with your anxiety. This in turn would help you deal with the situation.

The other thing you might do would be to join a keep-fit class locally, in an effort to start building an independent life, connections beyond the void of your current life. This might also be helpful for anxiety and potential new friendships.

However, that you are so very anxious and yet still wonder about leaving this marriage suggests that it is possibly a much worse situation than you have put words to. Is that so?

What happens if you feel lied to and feel the trust has gone

What do you mean by this? It sounds like something devastating has happened. Is this the thing that makes you want to leave?

I think you might benefit from talking to someone at Womens Aid (0808 200 247).
You also need to get help and advice on your anxiety from your GP.
Make an appointment. Also talk to your GP about getting some counselling.
You may even find your anxiety improves once you leave this man.
I'm not liking the sound of this situation.
I think what you have mentioned here is just the tip of the iceburg.
GP and WA!