Advice needed please- sister leaving abusive relationship.

[blueballoon79]

My sister is on her way to my house now so we can make plans for her to leave the relationship she's in.

She's been with this man for 7 years, has no children and will be staying at my house until she finds a private rental.

She's terrified and is unable to eat. I desperately want to do all I can to help her.

Any advice or thoughts will be gratefully received.

Thank you

He must have family even if he doesn't have friends. If he doesn't count as emergency homeless he can go to a hostel. Failing that he can pay for a BB on a credit card until he's sorted out new living accommodation.

hellsbellsmelons yes you're right, he's done a real number on her.
They've been together seven years, four years of which that he didn't work at all.
He's emotionally abusive and is constantly calling her stupid and thick. He won't allow her out with friends, she had to pay him to be able to come and visit me this weekend- £13 for a case of beer.

He sulks if she doesn't give him money and makes her life a misery. He's never been physically violent but sometimes I think it would be easier if he had as then she might realise how abusive he is.

I'm meeting with her again on Friday and am going to tell her that she doesn't need to give him £500, she needs to just get out now. She's going to be paying off the rent arrears and a months rent so that is more than enough.

He'll just have to get a job and earn his own money like everyone else does, won't he!?

Twinklestein there's only his mother who he doesn't speak to and a brother who he also doesn't speak to. I've told my sister that's not her problem and that if even his own mother won't put up with him and help him out then why the hell should she have to!

She won't make him "homeless". She will only make him "need to move house"

I would really, really emphasise this. Minimise it from her making him homeless, put it in perspective.

You're right Vivacia, she isn't making him homeless at all. If he ends up homeless it will be because of his own doing.

All she's doing is leaving an unhappy relationship which means he'll have to move out too.

I will keep emphasising that.