Rude angry men

[whatisforteamum]

Today i go in to work early as usual and cheerful after my 2 days off.I hour later i am going through the swing door(im a chef and was going to the dining room) when my boss was barging through from the other side.I immediately jumped back and apologized.He never said sorry just pushed until i moved.
i am applying like mad for another job but where do these angry men come from i only hemmed his trousers last week as im dont mind.
About a yr ago i was pushed into a hot oven and threatened by my last head chef,i contacted the police and decided to take it no further.
When i asked the man to apologize he said he would take my fucking head off next time ( which the police said was worse than the pushing)
where do these angry men come from and how come they never apologize as i would if i did wrong.

What did the Police do? That sounds grim.

Because they believe they have every right to go through you. They are full of their own self importance.

i would be horrified if my son was remotely like this !!.Ok my Dad is as polite as they come but now Dh is so rude and these middle aged men i feel surrounded by idiots.I didnt take the police thing further as i loved my job so much and the owner was keen to hush things up !! If i was the same i could understand but how can anyone male or female be so damn rude.

I was called a rude loudmouth by a vile angry customer (male) at work last week. I assure you I was not being either. He was clearly in a bad mood. Sexism and the patriarchy is everywhere, ladies. :(

entitled fuckwits seem to come into their own in cars I find. last week a bloke pushing into a queue of traffic gave me a gobful for not smiling meekly and letting him push in. arse.

male entitlement is alive and well unfortunately

I'm a man, and rude angry men treat me like this too.
Patriarchy? Or just rude, angry people?

oops sorry i rule i just feel surrounded by aggressive men although saying that we had a rude angry 22 yr old woman last yr who just hated her life and admitted to terrible road rage.

Society rewards entitled behaviour. And it rewards it in men even more than women. It's a high stress environment out there too. Too much emphasis on competition these days and not enough on society and mutual support. That's the root of the problem I think.

i.e. take the "Winning" out of society and the shitty behaviour would be reduced

that's ok whatisfortea, sometimes I despair at how nasty people can be to complete strangers. Sharp elbowed people in shops, car parks, etc. Very selfish.

I worked in catering for a long, long time, and in my experience the screaming and shouting is completely normal. Everyone gets stressed and everyone shouts in the kitchen. I went into the kitchen and screamed and threw my waiter pad on the floor once and nobody even looked up

WRT the swing door, do you have an "in" and an "out" door between the kitchen and the floor? That's the only reason that your boss might have behaved like that when he met you coming through the door: going through the doors in the wrong direction is dangerous and it's usually the first thing you learn when you start working in a restaurant as a waiter, but the chefs rarely go onto the floor so there's no real reason for it to be drilled into them in the same way. Still, there was no need for him to be a dick: he could have just explained to you that you were using the wrong door and left it at that.

The physical abuse is a different matter altogether. Your chef should not be laying a finger on you, never mind pushing you against an oven.

Well if it's men in the catering trade the after effects of alcohol and cocaine use could well be a militating factor. I did some work with an events catering company recently and saw first hand the substance use and boozing as off the scale, and 'come down Tuesday' when the worst withdrawals really hit left a lot of very short tempered men thumping around the place.

As for rude angry men in general, they've always been there...but I've met and worked with plenty of rude angry women in nursing too!

if it's men in the catering trade the after effects of alcohol and cocaine use could well be a militating factor

This is certainly true!

gincampari i have been in catering for 3oyrs and yes i have seen cocaine drunk chefs you name it,and the swing door is a heavy one way door to the pub,loos my point is it is just rude to push a door against someone when you both realize there is someone coming the other way....strangley i heard him tell someone it was his first morning in months he felt ok and no fuzzy head from drinking the night before.I dont earn much money but certainly not enough to be treated badly.I wouldnt have survived in kitchens all this time if i were a precious type but it makes me wonder how some people were brought up.

If the door is one way then your boss is a prick, end of story. And if it was the first day in months that he didn't wake up with a hangover then it's no wonder he was like a bear with a sore head: he's probably in alcohol withdrawal.

I totally agree with your point about not being paid enough to be treated badly. I can't even think how much you'd have to pay me to do a week in most of the kitchens I've known! I know job hunting is hard but keep going, keep looking. You deserve better.

Thanks i will my colleagues are lovely but it only takes one bully boy,i have been offered 3 jobs this yr but some of the hrs were not good with teens...onwards and upwards :).

Some men are just nobs.I got harranged the other day because I did nt reply to a message about something quickly enough I was selling on eBay by some entitled nob.I just did nt reply.Stupid twat I swear there is a generation of men who are terrified of women having any power.

Oh yes you are soo right Bessiebigpants,my boss has an ex and hardly sees his kids so i think all women are bitches in his eyes.He can go from calm to angry in a split second too.Maybe he needs some sex but that would involve actually being nice to a woman and he hasnt had any for a year.Last weekend he tried to message me to work and honestly didnt see txt as i wanted the extra money.Twice this week ive messaged him and no reply ( on purpose i guess) what a dick !!