Am I an oddball ?

[Stinkydad]

I've been with my partner for about 12 yrs and we have 4 lovely kids between us
We both have a child each from previous partners
Problem is my partner ( or is it me )
I feel that in just being used as a cash cow as she she seems uninterested in me as a person anymore
We live in a 4 bedroom property and she has moved me into a spare room while an additional double bed was moved into the main bedroom were all my 4 children sleep at night ( all under 7 ) with her
No matter how much money I transfer in to the joint account per month
She manages to spend it all and more
And when I question it she's very defensive
She hasn't spoken to her father for over 15 yrs
Hasn't spoken to her older brother for about 8 yrs
Fallen out with her other brother for about 2 yrs
And she hates her mom with a passion
She has also now fallen out with her daughter over her daughters friendship with her grandmother
I've noticed that she is a very jealous person and cannot stand the friendship I have with my mother
She seems to criticise any friend she has and has an opinion on most things
I once fell out with as she wasn't happy as my son ( from a previous partner)
Came over to stay with me , and i said its my house I'll do what I want
She forced me to sign over half of the house to her name or she would leave me , I agreed and gave her half the house

Now I'm getting fed up with it all and want out, but I know she will make it hard for me and will take me for everything
We've already been to relate a few yrs ago
I'm pulling my hair out here

sorry you are going through this - sounds like you are in an emotionally and financially abusive relationship. all the fall outs with her family sound like red flags of an abusive person. she sounds like a very difficult person to deal with who could turn nasty in a break up. i'd recommend getting legal advice and help from a domestic abuse charity (sorry cant work out if youre male or female from your post but if female conract womens aid, if male there are also charities who can help).

It doesn't sound like you are happy in this relationship. Maybe it is time you went to see a lawyer. Ok, so she now owns half your house, but possessions come and go, life is too short to be miserable.

Indeed... what Mexican said. Life is short. All the assets in the world won't fix this broken relationship. Why live in purgatory all because of a house? Let it go. You'll put the house on the market and each get half... you don't need to spend £20,000 on court/solicitors' fees to know this. It is what it is and for your happiness, cutting your losses is so worth it, IMO. Good luck. Life is for living!

Sorry your relationship has broken down but I'd suggest you get legal advice. I'm not sure why you wouldn't marry someone who you have 4 DCs with but I think you'll be relieved you didn't. However, she was quite right to insist on being co-owner of the property because, if you do split up, she has very few rights as it currently stands and cannot therefore 'take you for everything'. If I was to guess, I think she decided the partnership was over some time ago and has been preparing for independence since. If the money from the joint account hasn't been squirreled into an ISA somewhere, I'm a Dutchman.

So do get legal advice and good luck