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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Going for it, or leave it?

6 replies

onelifeliveit · 06/09/2014 10:26

Hi guys.
I met a lovely chap about a year ago. He is a friend of a friend so got to know him well at get togethers, dinners, going to the pub etc. We became good friends. His behaviour changed towards me after a couple of months, he became more flirty and interested in me and told a mutual friend he really liked me and wanted to go out just me and him. She told him to tread carefully as my Dad was very ill, sadly just after this he passed away. I have been a mess until recently and in no state to even think about a new relationship. Lovely chap has been great, really cooled off the chasing but there as a friend if I have needed anything. I am only now, a few months on realising I actually do really like this man. We are good friends and id hate to make that awkward. He has no idea I like him more than a friend, I have only just realised this myself. I know he liked me a few months ago, it was kind of common knowledge!! But maybe he has gone off me now?! I don't know how he feels but not sure whether I should leave things as they are or say something? I do really like him, I just couldn't see it clearly! Any opinions would be great thanks ??

OP posts:
onelifeliveit · 06/09/2014 10:26

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OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 06/09/2014 11:08

There's an expression... 'faint heart never won fair lady'. Sometimes - if it's something you really want - you have to take the situation as presented, join the dots a little, use your judgment and then take a punt.

"Oh lovely chap... you've been such a good friend to me. It was such an awful time and I really haven't been myself. If I regret anything it's that I didn't take you up on the offer of dinner for two that time. Do you fancy asking me again?"

(I should write rom-coms, I really should....)

however · 06/09/2014 11:11

I just swooned, Cog. Grin

CogitoErgoSometimes · 06/09/2014 12:25

I've just been reminded of a friend who fancied me but was lacking a bit of courage. We were walking somewhere together and he stopped, turned, smiled slightly sheepishly and said 'would it be OK if I held your hand?'... (Big 'aaahhhh bless')

You could try that.

onelifeliveit · 06/09/2014 12:37

Thanks Cog!! Arrh how sweet! It's just building up the courage Blush I keep thinking he will say 'errr I'm not into you anymore' Not that I think he would say it like that but you get the idea Grin

OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 06/09/2014 12:41

If he says that, it's his loss right? If you never take a risk you can miss a lot of opportunities. Ultimately it's not the risks we took or the mistakes we make that we regret, it's the opportunities squandered.

Go for it. :)

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