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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

after 37 years dh has just knocked on the door of his real father!!

6 replies

cheeryface · 22/09/2006 17:04

his mum and dad were only 15 when dh was concieved.
dh father says he isn't 100 % sure so, does anyone know anything about dna testing ??

OP posts:
AnAngelWithin · 22/09/2006 17:05

you can do it through the doctor for free or you can pay about £180 for a private swab testing kit that you can send off. hope this helps.

AnAngelWithin · 22/09/2006 17:06

I hope all goes ok for you and your husband by the way.

Spidermama · 22/09/2006 17:07

Wow! How did he come to knock on his door after all this time?

DNA Testing company

cheeryface · 22/09/2006 17:22

thanx. well, the story is that dh's real fathers parents were aghast at the situation when they fond out he had got a girl pregnant. They didn't want him tied down, wanted him to go to uni, so they paid the parents of dh's mum a sum of money to keep him out of it all

dh asked his mum a few years ago where his dad lived and she gave him a rough idea.

we managed to get the phone number a couple of years ago, but when he phoned, his father was obviously a bit shocked, but didn't sound very pleased. dh left his number but he never phoned.

anyway, after some checking around we find out the address, which isn't very far from where dh works and tonight on his way home he has plucked up courage to knock on the door!

strange thing is dh's father lives with his mother and for some reason didn't let dh in the house and said that he would meet with him and talk but it had to be away from the house.
he also said he wasn't 100% sure he was his father and said he couldn't really see anything of himself in dh. he said dh was just another man to him. He said they could tell each other what they had done with their lives but would their be any point (again, a bit odd i think)

so, dh is a little confused but at least he has done it after all this time!

OP posts:
Spidermama · 23/09/2006 10:53

That sounds like a very upsetting situation for your dh.

I wish him all the best.

fattiemumma · 23/09/2006 10:59

it sounds as if your DH's father is still in denial about what had happened. its not surprising that he doesn't see himself in your DH.

i would try and get your DH to take it as slowly as possible. this man may be quite controlled by his parents or simply doesn't want to upset what is likely to be an elderly lady.

Your Dh has been very brave in taking this step and he should feel pleased with himself for finally plucking the courage. whatever the outcome at least he now knows his father.

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