In nearly every case, whether friends or family it is always me who does the phone call to check if it's ok for me to visit them [always give a bit of notice]. If they are not busy, the response is friendly and I'm told to just come on over. Doesn't seem to be a problem. I don't pick up I'm not welcome or in the way.
I am not the type to put on others and if I felt unwelcome I would not push it, would just leave them alone....I don't have a lot of confidence anyway.
I have problems, especially at the moment, and am wobbling because it feels like I'm always 'chasing', but I need company sometimes and if I waited for them to come to me I'd be waiting for ages [tried this, that is what happened].
At the same time my home is my sanctuary, but it's fine if anyone wants to call as long as I have a bit of notice [an hour or two].
I rarely get invited to go anywhere with anyone, they do things/go out with others. Maybe they think they'll see me when I need them. But it's all a bit humiliating and I hate that I need people much, much more than they need me. I get a bit fed up and exhausted with it all.
It is an effort to visit, it's an effort to get the confidence up to phone in the first place but it doesn't seem to be noted.
Anyone else experience this, and why does this happen? I'm wondering if I choose a certain type of person as a friend as they are all like 'queen bees', sitting and waiting for others to run after them.