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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

wwyd? push for an answer about ow?

26 replies

imawigglyworm · 02/09/2014 22:01

ok so about 3 years ago I found out DH had cheated on me for about 8 months with some random he met at a works party. After a lot of talking we sorted what we could and I decided that we would try to make things work.
so now its mostly been going well the usual ups and downs but I haven't forgiven and I haven't forgotten.
At the time he told me it was some girl that he chatted to at a works party (not from his work) but this hasn't always sat right with me... I don't know just like a gut feeling that he's not being honest. There were comments etc before I found out that now make me think it was possibly someone he worked with. He has told me he has no reason to lie to me which is true to an extent I guess, but I cant shift this feeling it just keeps playing on my mind.
I want to ask him again and I want the truth BUT what IF I am wrong? and i'm pushing for answers that aren't there? I know its expected that I have lost trust in him after what he had done but he did everything he could to earn that trust back to where we are now.

Would you push for an answer and rock the boat again after things have been going well or do you think my mind is just questioning trust/making up scenarios?

OP posts:
Bambamboom · 04/09/2014 09:54

What a horrible situation, reading this makes me feel so sad. Let's just say I know how you feel (most probably) this hunch that it's someone at work is worrying, why do you think it's a particular someone?
Because maybe he did meet someone at the work get together that doesn't work there but now leaves you the dilemma of this woman at work that you think he could/would/has cheated on you with.
What if he's cheated with a randomer at the work party and has something with this other woman?
There must be a reason you think he would go there and if he's already cheated with random woman at work party then who's to say he wouldn't with the woman at work?
This is what my crazy, untrusting (with men in particular) mind works, so forgive me if I'm totally out of line but it's what sprung to mind when I read your thread.

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