Why do most men these days just want a bit of fun?!

[coldwater1]

Or is it just the ones i seem to meet?!

You can't generalise. Some people (gender-neutral) want casual, others commitment, others something in between and quite a lot start with 'fun' and it develops into something more serious. Where are you meeting these fun-lovers?

Pof although i have now hidden my profile for a while. Maybe i just attract those types for some reason? Can't think why as my pics on there are pretty normal.

You just have to filter them out cold usually you can tell by their texts/messages what they're looking for.

Sometimes I even ask them outright!

How old are you OP? What age range are you looking for?

I met my DH when we worked together. We were both looking for a bit of fun really. We had an awesome friendship that progressed to a physical relationship. Both adamant it would never turn into anything. Partly as we have big lifestyle differences and just thought it would never work.

4 years later, we are married with a 2 yr old DD and DS is due in a matter of weeks!
Sometimes a bit of fun is just the protective facade we put up to stop being over invested and used. But it can also lead to exactly what your looking for.

Can you meet men in real life? Have never done Internet dating, but I imagine there are more fun seeking types than serious relationshipers. Some of my mates use POF for easy shags...

Pof I think is one of those sites where people are looking for no strings fun! I recommended an online friend to it after his wife left him. He was wanting to meet people pretty casually. Saying that the first woman he met ended up moving in and wanting to change the soft furnishings. He didn't use it again. :) met someone irl and I think they are quite happy.

You probably need to use another dating site but I should imagine they all littered with folk looking for a quick shag. I met my dp at a party 22 years ago. I thought it would be yet another ons. As that was how I was finding things. 22 years later...... I just think that when you meet someone you really click with it wont matter if its just a shag to start with.

Maybe just go for the just a shag for a bit and see what happens?

There are a lot of people on internet dating sites (especially the free ones), just looking for no strings or a bit of fun. I think it's more likely you'll meet someone in real life or on something like eHarmony who is looking for an actual relationship.

I met my dh on pof.

I think it's just full of SO many people of course you're going to get some looking just for sex. You just have to be a bit ruthless and block and delete at the first whiff of no strings sex...unless you're someone looking for that of course.

I blocked about 30 people after their first message... another 20 I maybe replied to once or twice and then blocked. Dh and I clicked from the first message. Been married years now and have a toddler son.

I think i have half the site blocked!! Lol i'm 33 and was in a relationship for 14 years. I am not looking for marriage, kids and moving in but more than a one night stand. The blokes that message me are usually around my age as thats what i set the filter for and after a couple of messages being exchanged i find out they just want 'fun'. Maybe i should just do that for the time being then. Not sure its really me though, i was like that when i was very young however!

Every dating site has people looking for different things - free or not!

Just because you pay doesn't mean you'll get a better calibre of people, I've paid for Match and used POF too.

I work in Education which is predominantly female so I rarely meet men in rl situation so online dating is my only option. I go out with friends a lot but not very often to bars etc. I have also just joined my local Meetup group, but this is to extend my social circle, not to date!

I think there are a lot of people in our situation cold who are single, and can't seem to find a decent, normal bloke!

I think a lot work on the principle of, Nothing ask, nothing get. And anyone new always gets tons of interest. I think you need to adopt a robust approach. The predatory ones know there's some chance of no strings sex so won't be put off by rebuffs, they go onto the next profile.

Have you spotted anyone you know in rl yet?

Not spotted anyone i know bit had a couple of blokes say they've seen me around the area we live in!

Doesn't matter which site you use, there will be a proportion of people who are there for just fun. And, you know, there's actually nothing wrong with that as long as they are open and honest about it. Because, you know, there are women who want just fun as well!

Come over to the dating thread! loads of us in the same boat over there!

Thanks louby, think i will do just that!