Living together Trial and I am anxious

[Lifeisforlivingkatie]

My boyfriend of 3 years and I agreed to try living together for a few weeks after our summer holiday. We go away this weeken for two weeks. I have two children and we have been on 4 no days with kids already. He has never married or lived with anyone since Uni. We are both late 30s. Up until now he stays 4-5 nights with us including all weekend. He is the most loving man.

For some reason he was hesitate to move in fully, so I raised the subject a few weeks ago to say we should take the next step or consider splitting up. He lived things as they are getting the best of both worlds and was concerned about ruining our relationship by becoming too relaxed and losing our inviduality and hobby time. He went to boarding school at 7. Family not close like mine.

Anyway we agreed to try living together as we both want our relationship. Now I the time is approaching and I am feeling a little anxious. We went and ordered our bed this weekend to be delivered when we get back from holiday. Our first joint purchase. He said he is looking forward to Sunday mornings in our new bed.

This weekend he asked me what would impress me more a diamond or him building me a bike from scratch (he loves cycling) maybe I would get you both he said. My friends think its crazy to try living with someone he should be begging to marry me apparently. Please share your thoughts and experiences. Did you all have grand romantic proposals?

Apart from the above he is very romatic and has bought jewellery on every birthday/Christmas. Dinners and flowers too.

You're right, but then I think you need to take a positive approach. He's trusting you and doing something that's not his preference (and in a pretty major way). In his shoes I'd need to see you being upbeat about this and not having cold feet.

Also, you don't say anywhere in your posts why you wNt him to move in other than that's just what people do Nd your friends think.

He does sound nice anyway, liked the bit about building you a bike (if you like cycling too!). Did the diamond comment make you think he might be hinting about a future marriage?

Thank you, you are right Viavacia, I need to be up it and excited. Yes the Ravenum I thought he might be hinting. He says engagement rings are a de beers marketing ploy, him building something for me is more from the hurt and shows more effort that a swipe of a credit card. I want to move in with him because I love him and he is the best thing since sliced bread.

I am must admit to taking my close friends opinions to heart. I should look into our relationship. I suppose it's normal to be anxious before a big step

As long as you don't feel anxious because you're not sure about your relationship. As long as it's you that wants you to be together, not your friends :-)

Dp and I live in separate houses. We've been together 9 years. I already had 2 dc, we had another together.

It's the perfect compromise for us (at the moment). Everyone is happy, everyone knows where they stand.

We did live together, but oh my, it was an unmitigating disaster. I left with the children to save our relationship. The dc totally understood the reasonings behind the move.

We are still together and totally rock solid, as a couple and as a family unit.

Many would say it's dysfunctional, but not for us. It works perfectly.

That's refreshing Red7, someone who has tried a different way. It's good to hear of a couple that made it work by doing things differently.