Pregnant and just finished with the father

[Pigpen37]

I just found out I was pregnant last week, it was a 'happy accident'. When I told my boyfriend he went silent and didn't talk about it at all for days. Last Friday I told him I didn't think I could make a social engagement we had that weekend as I felt nauseous and tired. He told me to "suck it up" I snapped and asked if he'd ever been pregnant before and he told me he already hated being around me, I was already a massive bitch and he couldn't cope with 9 more months of me being a cnt. His words not mine. I made the decision to leave him. I can't be around an abusive bf when I'm still in the early stages and I'm also 37 so I'm so scared of anything going wrong. He's 32 and I can't believe he spoke to me like that but he has been abusive like that before and is frequently moody and gives me the silent treatment instead of talking...he doesn't communicate at all. Urgh. What makes this worse is I am in Canada and now I've left him I've booked a flight home. I need to be in my support network right now. But I can't help bursting into tears I really wanted it to work. I didn't want to be a single mum but I'll bloody well do it. I just wanted to rant! Have I been hasty?

No, you haven't been hasty

You have probably just made the only sane decision you could in the circumstances

Good luck with the pregnancy x

Thank you.

No. Not hasty at all. I wish I'd been as smart as you many years ago.... I was in the same situation, but married, so I stayed.... You sound really smart and looking out for yourself; keep doing just that.

You've totally done the right thing.

You sound really strong. He sounds like an immature wanker.
Well done for making a tricky decision. Hats off and .

Wow, thank you so much everyone. It's hard to gain perspective when you're right in the middle of it. I know my mother would be beside herself if I had decided to stay with him. Besides the heart break I'm kind of looking forward to being back in the UK whilst I figure my shit out. Can't wait for the corrie omnibus! Thanks again

Congratulations on your pregnancy and getting rid of your bf.

Really, being a single mum is only bad compared to being with a wonderful husband, but types like your bf and my ex are just an added problem.

The way ahead is not going to be an easy one so hopefully you have plenty of family/friends for support. Being a single parent is not easy, nor is it easy to be in a partnership with someone who is abusive so you have probably chosen the easier path here.
He is still the father though and you will have to communicate again regarding the child for many years to come so you will probably never be rid of him from your life.
I hope that you can find someway of communicating in the future.
I wish you and your baby all the best. Stay strong.

Congratulations! Get back to the UK before the baby is born whatever you do. Women get trapped far from home due to The Hague convention all the time so well done on making such a sensible decision.

No, not hasty. You've made absolutely the right decision. Neither you nor your baby needs an abusive man/father.

Great decision to come home. The thought of being trapped in another country because child can't leave without father's consent is unbearable. Good luck with your pregnancy!

Congratulations on your pregnancy and on escaping this knobhead.

If I were you I would not mention the fact you are going home in case he decides to come over all charming and try to persuade you to stay. As PP have said, if you have the baby in Canada you are then stuck there.

At least at this early stage you can travel easily and get your life sorted back home with friends and family. If he wants to be involved later then he can be, but I wouldn't count on it.

Good luck!

I had not considered The Hague convention at all so it's a good job I'm going home. I really appreciate everyone's responses I'm still feeling kind of alone till I get back. I don't want to tell any friends here about the pregnancy in case it doesn't go full term. I'm now paranoid about everything I eat and drink in case it harms the wee bean! Anyway he doesn't know where I'm staying right now so he can't turn up, I have agreed to meet him before I leave....maybe I owe him that, but it will be in a public space.