What the hell do I do now ?!

[icclemunchy]

So OH left on wed night. Things have been a bit rocky for a while but generally we pottered along, then about 6weeks ago we found out I was pregnant. Completely unplanned and on his part unwanted. He asked me to get an abortion which I refused and we pottered along with some arguments but generally getting along a bit better.

We had our scan in wed and afterwards he told me he really didn't want the baby and I had to either abort have it adopted or move out leaving our DD with him

Since he left he's come home twice to get some clothes and said hello to DD but that's it, he won't talk to me and I don't know what to do now.

I don't want this to be it. I love him and even though he's been a dick I can get past it because I think it's more shock talking than him iyswim, but if he won't talk to me how can I even tell him.

And if it really is over how am I Ment to sort everything. I don't even know where to begin

And why do you want him to stay? He sounds utterly vile....and why did you get pregnant in the first place

Fudge - accidents do happen! Contraception fails etc.

iccle - I'm so sorry you're going through this - he does sound awful. It takes two to make a baby, and if he won't own up to the responsibility he has for his child, you are well rid of him. Concentrate on you, your baby, and your DD.

does he think the baby isn't his?
I am sorry your going through this.... perhaps its best to accept his decision...
If I were you, I would pack his stuff and make it clear he needs to stay gone, concentrate on your DD and your unborn child, you will be okay in the long run and I am sorry but he is acting like an utter cock
Good luck

Going to make him sound like more of an arse now but I fell pregnant because we got carried away and didn't use a condom

This sucks I'm over 150miles from my family but moving home would mean giving up my awesome antenatal care (pre existing conditions) and taking DD away from her dad/childminder/friends but I have hardly anyone here.

And I'm going to have to give up my horses/dogs/everything. I can't decide if I'm furious or devastated. I don't even know how I'm going to pay the rent because I don't work

How angry/determined is he?

How do you think he will cope with it in a month or so? Is he just so shell shocked he can only see the negative side and just can't cope with the idea of it?

If he has just shut down because he only sees an enormous financial burden then he is going to feel like a total twat in a few months, when reality gets through. Would you be able to get past this?

From recent threads he really isn't going to get any understanding here, but I thought I'd ask the obvious questions, while I had a chance

A big part is finances but he's a bit of a head in the sand type when it comes to money anyway he's not one to sit down and work out a budget for example.

I think the rest of it is he's brother is an arse and it seems to have coloured his judgment on sibling full stop (I can see his point and I didn't have to grow up with his brother!!)

Part of me hopes he'll come round but I can't just sit around and wait can I? But if I move on will he just move on because I have