Boy, it is so painful!

[inneedofsomeclarity]

I know that is stupid! Husband and I split up over the weekend so of course it's going to be painful. I know now that this is absolutely the right thing to do but am finding it surreal and can't really believe it is happening. I am exhausted at the thought of all the things we (which will mean I) need to do to get to the other side but am also massively relieved that his issues will no longer be my problem. I am hopeful for the future but feeling so desperately sad and, having almost fantasised about this for some time, am finding it way way more painful than I thought I would. It hurts deep down in my heart. I know I'll be fine in the long term but wish I didn't have to feel this! I know that probably all sounds ridiculous but just needed to get it off my chest. Am not ready to talk about it in real life because I will cry and cry.

Hi, thanks, it definitely helps to know I'm not alone in this feeling, yes we have 2 dds, 6 and 3. I am just looking forward to the time when hes gone and we can just get on with it on our own, although he will still be a part of their lives. It will be a relief to get into our own routine.

Hello, I went through this a couple of years ago and even though I knew it was the right decision and had been on the cards for years, it felt like someone had died, real palpable grief. I know how you feel and it can be overwhelming.

However, within a couple of months I had settled down, got everything organised, felt in control of my life for the first time ever and even started dating (met a fantastic bloke who makes me so happy).

It will take a little time, and I know that not everyone adjusts so quickly and is ready or willing to start again with a new relationship so quickly, but you will get through it, you will start to feel the benefits of being independent and self-reliant.

In the meantime MN is here for you with wisdom, experience and sympathy and at some point I hope you feel strong enough to talk about it in RL too, as there's no substitute for a real hug from someone who knows and cares about you.