has anyone ever left a dh/dp because they felt they made them unhappy?

[LEMmingaround]

I know that I should do this. I have totally fucked up. I don't work and this has put sooo much strain on my dp. The last teo jobs I couldn't cope and left due to stress.i am totally demotivated. Hardly want sex and have let myself go.

Dp is unhappy we have no money at a time ehen we should but we have a crippling mortgage and debts. All down to me having pnd when dd was born. But that was 9 years ago.

I have no chance of getting a job. I am fat. Have bad teeth and generally am a nothing.

I feel that I wsnt to give dp a chance to meet someone else and be happy but I don't know how to start. My lovely dd adores us both but I know thst if I posted thst dp was the wsy I am you would say yo leave as you cant stay in a relationship for the children.

I feel like I am a poison in his life. I know he deep fown doesn't love me anymore but I don't even have the strength to let him go. I would kill mysrlf but can't because of dd.

Has anyone else left for this reason and it worked out ok in the end?

Wow. You are really capable and experienced and you have an amazing cv. You just need the confidence to match.
One step at a time. .. First step get on the computer and design a dog walking flyer. The Get online and research dog walking insurance. Register yourself as self employed. Put up the flyert at local shops and pop themthrough letter boxes.
Feel the fear and do it. You only need one client to startto feel better.
Your husband will love the new you.
Dogs don't mind dodgy teeth or wibbly bums. ...:)

Hi Lem. I have a lot of sympathy with that 'hemmed in, don't know what to do' feeling.

My thoughts ...

1. See the GP, and don't rule out medication or a review of your existing medication. A spell of depression can leave you tired, indecisive, pessimistic, unable to do small things, etc, but the experts know best

1. It sounds like you're pretty fit already. But consider something simple such as a daily walk? This might help you feel mentally and physically better, and gives you a fixed target to aim for each day.

1. Regarding work. I would aim for something very easy, and very low commitment while you build yourself up. Dog walking would be great. You're highly educated, so what about selling off some of your books on Amazon; or selling some unwanted items on eBay. One small transaction at a time.

If you do something small like this, you will start to have money you didn't have to ask for, and feel more confidence about next steps. As others say though, one baby step at a time. Spend 10 mins on whatever thing you think needs doing. Just 10 mins.