Think this is the end but don't know how to let go

[TooMuchJD]

DH & I had volatile relationship from offset. Now hav 3 kids & nothing in common other than shared DNA within them after 7 yrs of marriage. We argue over everything, certainly hav issue relating to co-dependency & quite frankly I'm becoming a complete bitch to him as I can't be arsed with the drama anymore.
We are not good for each other, our relationship is toxic but bizarrely I feel incapable of changing the situation?? Why??

Fear of the unknown.

Can't be with him, can't be without him is so true.

My ex cheated on he and owed me money and I hated him but found it hard to let go.

It too k me a year to get over him and everything that happened.

He was an everyday part of my life for many years and it's hard to lose something so familiar.

There is certainly an element of fear & lack of confidence in my own decision making ability. Mostly I'm afraid that I am the horrible person he keeps telling me I am snd I just can't see it

Well that's unlikely isn't it... Why don't you back off a bit and think about single life and how great it could be?

What is it exactly that you want for the future? You need to answer that question before you can get out of this. Is there something specific that is stopping you? In my case for example I stayed in a horrible destructive relationship for years because I couldn't take the DCs out of the country and I knew I wouldn't be happy living as a divorcee in XH's country. Unfortunately now I'm having to do just that. Eventually things will come to a head so face up to your fears and take control of your life

If you do what you've always done you will get what you always got. Simples. Make a change. Or stay in your bed......

Make a change though and your life will be so much happier as will the dcs

'Comfort zones' can take all forms, including acrimonious marriages. Maybe you're hoping it'll get better? Maybe you fear being independent? Maybe you don't think you deserve to be happy? Takes self-confidence, energy and a bit of planning to end a marriage. If you're missing any of those things, ask someone to help you. Friends, family, a good solicitor. Do a bit of homework, dispel the fears, and then follow through.

Good luck