Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What to do... (Long - really sorry)

3 replies

SheerWill · 29/07/2014 12:42

Hello wise ladies of Mumsnet. A few months ago during a 'discussion' about the future dp suggested that we coparent ds (my ds from prev marriage) as friends who live together rather than as a couple as he feels unable to give me the sort of life I want e.g. marriage and more children. He has always said he would never get married again which I accept (even though it is something I would have liked) but has wavered on having children making me feel really unsettled about the future.

I felt really hurt at the suggestion and couldn't understand it, so just ignored it and carried on. Then I started looking for a potential place for ds and I to move to on our own just in case (without telling dp). He saw one of the places on my laptop and wanted to find out more so we went to look. We absolutely fell in love with the house and the location and it's closer to school for when ds starts in sept.

However last week dp told me that he doesn't love me as much as he loved two previous girlfriends. I'm not sure if that's they way he intended to put it, but I just can't get past this. It's really getting in the way as I just can't find it in me to be affectionate towards him after that. I'm so find of him and he's been a real rock to me and ds, but I've found my feeling for him dwindling because he says these things without thinking and I can't just 'get over' them.

Now we're here in this house until at least november. Do I go back to his original plan and take him up on it until we can move out again. I would have to move back to my parents house, which is miles from ds school and dp would move back to his house. But I really want to be with someone who wants similar things to me and who loves me deeply, not one who is comparing me unfavourably to ex girlfriends.

If I end it now I'm hoping we might stand a chance of remaining friends as I wouldn't want to cut ties altogether. He's been the main man in ds' life since he was 2.

Any advice gratefully recieved. It's really getting me down.

OP posts:
Jan45 · 29/07/2014 12:44

OFGS, get rid OP, why accept half a man, half a relationship, half bloody everything, if he can't even give you the basics then forget it, you will be happier on your own and free to meet a partner that is actually a grown up.

I wouldn't even give him a second thought, he's a cruel bastard who only cares about what suits him.

StarSwirl92 · 29/07/2014 12:45

Leave him, he's just not that into you Sad

YvyB · 29/07/2014 13:19

Go for it! Your new life awaits!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread