hi I really need some advice or feedback on a prob that I've got
I've been with my dp for 15 months now. He has two dd's one aged 4 and the other 3. I've got a 4 yr old 2 and a 6 year old and i'm also pg. He has had regular contact every single week since I've met him, we have had the girls overnight every Friday and sometimes see them in the week. He is also spot on with the maintenance every month too. There has only been 3 weeks in the past 15 months where we have been unable to have them but have made sure that we swapped the night that we had them or we have took them on an extra outing like swimming or for a meal out.
I've also, without dp, gone to babysit for his ex so she could go to a concert. I've also been the one who mainly goes and get them and dropped them where where his ex has specified (dp can't drive)
dp works nights and four months ago had to change to a friday night.We still had the girlsbut it meant that I did most of the caring for all four kids, this was ok at first but it has gradualyy got harder for me, as my ex dosen't have my two on a sat morning anymore plus I also have to go to work on a sat afternoon. I'm also knackered being pg, feeling sick, and also i'm up at night with dp youngest as she's a poor sleeper and is quite often ill!
This has caused a lot of rows between me and dp asi I don't get a break myself anymore.
His dd's also mentioned to his ex that they don't see him and daddy is always grumpy and in a bad mood all the time which is true, and this has prompted us to try and find a solution.
We've offerred to have the girls every other wednesday night and every other fri (so ex still gets her fridays nights out) and take them to school. We did this for the first time last night and it worked out really well as dp is of on a wed and he got some decent quality time with them which was important to him and them.
Now here is the prob (i'm getting there!) his ex and her family and dp have all remained friends, dp is ex brothers best man next sat. It is our turn to have the girls next fri the night before the wedding, to which we've offered but have been declined as the girls are bridesmaids and need to get ready etc. I'm perfectly happy to have the girls again next wed or even thursday but today we've been told by ex that we have to have them on the saturday all day and at night too so she can have a break and get pissed. so that means at the wedding whilst dp is preparing the speech etc he has to have his girls plus my two as I'm working a 6 hour shift that day too. Then we have to sit there and look after them by ourselves at the night do and watch all the members of their family get pissed then take them home at the end of the night. I've got to get up for work at 6 next morning and get four kids ready plus myself ready for work, dp is going to work too for a couple of hours on overtime.
dp ex can be a cow.. she has stopped him from seeing the kids twice because of the differences between them. She also let slip to her brother that I was pg something we wanted kept quite because bride to be had a m/c a couple of months ago.
I quite like his ex and we get on well but sometimes she makes me want to scream
Dp is a good dad and we are doing our best to work round our shifts and keep everyone happy but this wedding has really annoyed us. It will be the first time in nearly a year that me and dp have had a night out even if it is with the kids and I don't mind all of us looking out for the kids but not for us two just to sit there and watch the others get pissed. (I can't drink anywhere)
Am I overeacting or is it me.
thanks