Have NC for this. I had and ended a horrible 10 year marriage to serial adulterer/liar/emotional abuser and we have 2 gorgeous DC, primary age. I left him 2 years ago and I have really enjoyed being free and single and not short of offers of dates etc. 3 months ago I met a great guy - successful, intelligent, great company, similar values etc. His marriage ended years ago, he has 2 kids he sees a lot of. All going well, so I thought but some red flags early on. Declarations of love, mainly. But my spidey senses were sent into overdrive with this because this was exactly what my ExH was like. So last week I did a FB snoop, and his long term ex girlfriend (after he split with his ExW) was still on his friends list. He told me he was NC with her and has been a bit vague as to when they finished, but he said they haven't been together since Xmas. Her status still says she is in a relationship with him, but there are no mutual posts for the last 3 months or so. Then last week her photos showed her being in Cornwall on holiday. He's then suddenly decided to take his kids to the same resort (he told me this but not that she would be there...) while she's there. At least I think she's still there. (Assuming)
I don't give a flying toss if he's still in contact with with the Ex GF, I'm not the jealous type at all, as their kids were close. I do, however take issue with him lying about stuff he doesn't need to lie about. I can't deal with anyone who hides what they're doing just because it might not be what I hear. He has explicitly told me that they don't speak and I find it very hard to believe that this impromptu trip is pure coincidence. I have told him to eff off. And yes I do feel shit.
So, overreacting much because of my experiences with exh? Or are these flags crimson?
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Please tell me I've done the right thing.
12 replies
Overflowingashtray · 26/07/2014 21:17
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