Crush has made contact...

[Delphinegreen]

I've known this guy 4/5 years always had a crush on him, I'd class him as an acquaintance.

Last Christmas for the first time both single - me 6 months, him 2 we met for a drink. It was a little shy & stilted. Nonetheless I invited him out again but it fizzled, a bit of game playing on his part then I called him on his behaviour & told him I wasn't interested in games/friendship then cut contact. I reasoned he wasn't that into me.

Today out of the blue he contacts me to say hi, I haven't replied yet. He's in my distant social circle. Do I reply bright & breezy & non committal? Don't owe him anything but don't want to be rude.

I obviously still like this guy, I think about him a lot but am wary of been drawn in to another unneeded emotional drama but do you give someone another chance? How do you set things on the right footing or will the pattern just repeat?

If you don't want not to contact him, I'd just reply with "Hi". Then see what he wants and what he does.

Getthefeck - believe you me, I tore a strip off him last time so he knows not to mess about.

I've replied to text light & fluffy, didn't ask a question/start a convo so effort is required from him if he wants to start something.

It'll end in disappoint or tears. I wouldn't invest any time in this.

I may be projecting here.

Hi, is that it? That's a bit off already, probably along the lines of he's still not that fussed about you, I'd not reply but if you really must reply with a Hi back, do not go into a sentence, let him chase you for a change.

If he messaged just 'hi' I would probably ignore.

If he messaged something like 'hi, I've been thinking about you and wondered how you were?' I would probably reply with a friendly but short response.

Yes, was the text just Hi? We need more in order to judge him

I hope it was more than "hi" because otherwise, given that you've already texted back, it won't take much more for him to have you hook, line and sinker.

"I've known this guy 4/5 years always had a crush on him"

Do these things ever work out after so much time? Seems a long time to be crushing on someone; I'd be bordering on giving up completely by now.

I'd take pleasure in ignoring tbh.
He's testing the water/ wanting an ego stroke and will do the same again.
If you reply, you are telling him you are prepared to accept his shitty behaviour.
If he texts again with a more enthusiastic/ honest/ emotionally risky message then I might just reply.

Hi Delphine....similar happened to me this week, a guy who never got off the ground randomly sent a text. Its perplexing.

How is it perplexing, these guys are just picking up from where they left off probably under the illusion they can just do that.

At no point have I been expected to pick up where I left off. Its OK for many of my female friends to go for months without contacting me, and we do pick up where we left off. I guess I am perplexed because I didn't really feel significantly involved with this guy, and I am curious to how he is....he was a nice bloke, do I know what he wants? Well I am not sure I am at all fussed any more, but I am not in need of a relationship with him which I suspect might be his problem, who knows?

I agree with lady blahblah. Hi is just testing the water...to see if you are available.

'Hi' is also something someone texts if they're waiting for ages at the airport or are tipsy and feeling lonely on a friday night.

Go for it o.p.
How remember how lucky you are. Some people have to live with the heartache of knowing they'll never be with the person they want to be with.
However you're a bit long in the tooth for a crush aren't you. I hope it goes deeper than just finding him nice to look at, because if that's all this based on then sadly it probably wont last. Have fun trying it out though