Am I being over sensitive?

[Animalgirl]

Have become intimate with a friend of mine recently. I last spoke to him a couple of weeks ago as he's been away, we had a very intimate text conversation the night before he went away and I've really been looking forward to seeing him when he got back.

He suggested to me before he went away that he'd see me the day he got back, but got back later than he thought so we didn't get the chance to meet up. We have limited opportunity to meet up due to his work commitments and when he sees his daughter. I haven't therefore seen him or spoken to him since he got back.

Anyway tonight I am outside when he's driving down my way (it's his route home) and I wave and he waves back and carries on driving. He doesn't stop to say hello and it's upset me. Am I being over sensitive, is he just being a man and not thinking or am I justified in being upset? I should point out that it's not a busy road, there was no other traffic and therefore no actual reason for him not to stop.

I see him fairly regularly driving by and sometimes he just waves, sometimes hoots and sometimes stops to chat. If I'd spoken to him a couple of days ago or something it wouldn't have bothered me him just waving but we haven't had any contact for a couple of weeks and I'd like to have just said hello, nice holiday etc.

I feel like texting "was hello too much effort" or "lose your manners while you were away" but I have resisted temptation. If I'm intimate with someone I don't think I'm being unfair in being pissed off with him. Any thoughts would be welcome.

You are worth more than this.

He will give you nothing ultimately. But you will have to give lots to get even a teeny response.

Why should you?

Flounce off.

Find yourself a man who adores you. Not one who can't even be bothered to fit you into his schedule.

Sounds like no matter what anyone says, you're going to carry on with this anyway

Why do you have such a lack of self esteem?

I lacked self esteem up until my twenties. I felt undesirable, was extremely shy and had no confidence. I am no longer like that, I've gained confidence and lost the shyness. I'm never going to be the prettiest girl around, but no longer feel too bad. I still feel that I'm unlikely to sweep someone off their feet straightaway, all of my relationships have started out as friendships with men that I have known a while.

I don't generally put up with nonsense from men these days, I have been quite happy being single. However, I rarely meet anyone who I feel attracted to and have a spark with and I tend to be very fussy about who I get involved with.

If I was involved with someone who was regularly upsetting me or if the relationship was making me miserable I would end it. Yes I did get upset the other day, but a lot of the time he makes me happy. I enjoy his company, we can talk for ages about anything, he makes me laugh, he's kind, helpful, interesting and passionate. He pays me lots of compliments, says nice things and has put a spring in my step.

We had a really good talk on Sunday, he went into detail about his marriage broke up and how it's made him extremely wary and it's helped me understand why he's maybe held back a little with me. I don't expect that to change for the moment, but he has assured me that it is not me but what happened and I no longer feel confused.

"I don't have a problem with the no strings sex bit but it's making me feel like shit" Erm, it sounds like you do have a problem with the no-strings fumbles soon to be sex bit.

"I don't expect it to be a potential relationship I would like it to develop that way." YOU WANT A RELATIONSHIP! With a man who says and acts like he doesn't want a relationship.

At some point you're going to have to deal with your mother's death and 'distracting' yourself by emotionally attaching to a FWB scenario, will only lead to heartbreak. This isn't a short term pain vs long term gain scenario but rather a short term pain and an even longer term pain one.

Get off the train before it crashes.

You say he's been completely honest with you. But you're not listening to him. There is no future here. He likes you, as a friend, that he can fuck from time to time, at his (not your) convenience. He's h

Posted to soon. He's honest, but ultimately self absorbed. Back away, also be honest with him, and tell him that , sorry - it's not enough. You deserve more.

He's nice to you. Great.

Sounds like you're really falling for him, this man who doesn't want a relationship with you.

Sorry Isetan, I probably didn't phrase that very well I put that it was "the feeling like shit" bit that I had a problem with. I didn't mean the no strings sex was making me feel that way, it was the not stopping to chat to me that upset me. I am not denying that I would like a relationship with him but am accepting of his reasons and it's not an issue.

I was emotionally attached to him before anything happened between us, I would find it easier if I wasn't, but I can't help the way I feel. I'd be hurt right now if it ended so is it so wrong to continue with it and enjoy it while it lasts.

Fuckthemagicdragon I am listening to him. I know we don't have a future together. Maybe I do deserve more, but I rarely meet anyone I like who likes me back and that I have great chemistry with. I have a really lovely time when we see each other.

Winky it's more a case of fallen for than falling for. We have grown closer since this started.

So I dont understand why you are posting in relationships then OP if you think everything is very acceptable to you???

The main reason I posted was because I was upset that he didn't stop to chat and I wasn't sure if I was justified in being upset or if it was me being too sensitive.

I was also confused by him as I felt he was holding back on me a little while at the same time saying and behaving like he loved seeing me when we met up. Getting mixed messages in other words. I thought whatever was holding him back was down to me as I couldn't think of any other reason. However, we had a good talk on Sunday and he really opened up to me, told me things that I really didn't expect him to tell me and I now totally understand why he was holding back on me, that it is in no way down to me and everything to do with something that happened to him. My confusion has gone.

Although I probably haven't listened to the suggestions that I should stop seeing him that has been given to me here, I really do appreciate everyone taking the time to give me advice which I do know is very sound advice. Because of the way I feel about him I would just like to see how things go between us. Most of the time he makes me happy, if that should change then I will stop seeing him. Thank you for your support.

Support is always here. X

Thank you Winky x. Much appreciated.