Why are mothers so nasty sometimes !!!!

[hoolagirl]

Just a vent.
Dropped DS down at mothers as she watches him on a Monday when i'm working.
Couldn't manage to get to the butchers this morning as ds had a 2 hour nap, then gave him lunch before I took him down and it closes for lunch.
Asked mother if she would go, its 5 minute walk from her house, she usually goes out a walk or drive anyway, she said no, tough, I should have managed this morning, maybe I should have but it just didnt work out like that.
I said in a light hearted manner, oh its ds's fault, don't you know he's the cause of all my problems (laughing) !!
To which she replies quite nastily 'well you know what to do if you get pregnant again then, don't you' !! WTF is she all about !!
I just left instead of causing a scene, but really quite hurt by the comment!

That is horrible. I'm sure she didn't mean it, although I can see what that would have upset you. I think it was right to leave without causing a scene.

My dad has a theory that our mothers & MILs are all secretly jealous of us know their own children have grown up. he thinks they dont realise it themselves half the time and this is the route of the odd, nsaty comment that flys our way at times.

menopause.

Menopause happened years ago.
Think the jealousy thing could be somewhere near it, I remember when DS was a baby that she would say to him 'im your mummy' !!
I had PND and need her help but she tried to take it too far!!
She always makes nasty comments, this one just got to me though !

My mum used to do it a bit. She used to say where's 'my baby'. She was also a bit bossy and undermining with him. Often when I was just settling him to sleep, or if he was already aslssp and she came over she would want to hold him. I would say 'no' because I didn't want to have him disturbed but she would just badger me until I gave in. One evening she came over when he was asleep and after about 30 mins of being told she would have to wait until he woke up, I caught her tickling his toes to wake him up! I knoe she wanted to hold him but he's a little person, who was enjoying a much needed nap, not a cuddly toy to be passed around. It really annoyed me!!! I think if I was old and mine had all grown up, I would be a bit jealous too to be fair, although I hate to think I would be upsetting. It's a magical part of our lives that is over for them.

Just do what I do, take a deep breath and ignore silly/ride comments like that. If they really get to you, have a proper word. I had a 'word' with my mum after the tickling toes incident and she got much better.

i think some mums point out where you are going wrong/making mistakes, and forget that they were in the same position themselves all those years ago.....they never want to let on that they weren't perfect either. also in my case, my mother really didnt have much of a life after i grew up and left home, so sadly, me and my DS are her life.....so yes, jealousy is an issue sometimes