Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

New relationship angst

7 replies

LittleBoPeepers · 06/07/2014 22:35

New to this and would value some views to put my mind at rest. I have been seeing a guy for just over 3 months. He is a single parent with full responsibility for his youngest child. He's a busy chap, lots of interests, we have a lot in common and I really like him as a person, he is very kind and very family orientated. He is quite bruised from some unfortunate events in his life that were costly to him financially. His marriage ended 7 years ago and his last serious relationship ended late last year. I can see from talking to him that he is still reeling from this a little but is glad to be out of the situation as he has been very hurt. My marriage ended over two years ago. I married very young and since my marriage ended two years ago I have had a couple of short term relationships, the first I felt horribly rushed and in the other I quickly saw some worrying red flags and got out fast. I have a DD myself so know I need to be cautious for both our sakes. We see each other 2 or 3 times a week child care permitting. We talk every day on the phone about every day things. I feel quite blessed to be having this lovely experience of having met someone who despite all that he has been through is still a genuinely nice person and trying to make something of himself again. My problem is that I feel ready for more but am afraid to ask for fear of being too needy and as it's only been a short time I don't want to scare him off either. Has anyone got any wisdom on how I could feel more confident and get over worrying about being rejected? I know a lot of this is about the fact that I just like him so much and I really don't want to think about not being with him but know that in the scheme of things, I don't really know him well at all. Also does it sound like the right pace for things to be progressing? Am I tying myself up in knots unnecessarily? Am I wrong to be wanting things to move a bit faster? We have slept together, no problems with that either which obviously makes me like him even more. I think I am just a bit too impatient and certainly if he was rushing me I would be seeing this as a red flag! I need to chill don't I???

OP posts:
inlectorecumbit · 06/07/2014 22:46

Oh yes, rein yourself in a wee bit. You may out him off. 3 months is no time at all.
Just enjoy yourself and take it slow.

LizzieBelle · 06/07/2014 22:48

chill out and take it s.l.o.w

Wrapdress · 06/07/2014 22:58

Read some of the dating books out there written by men. Very enlightening! Forcing things along is the exact wrong thing to do.

Cabrinha · 06/07/2014 23:20

You talk every day on the phone, and see each other 2-3 times a week.
What does ready for more mean?

At 3 months in, what more do you want than frequent contact to get to know each other?

What aren't you getting that you want?

Cabrinha · 06/07/2014 23:21

You talk every day on the phone, and see each other 2-3 times a week.
What does ready for more mean?

At 3 months in, what more do you want than frequent contact to get to know each other?

What aren't you getting that you want?

Mrsgrumble · 06/07/2014 23:26

Hmm.. So twelve weeks or a bit more. Enjoy it for what it is. I believe what is meant for you won't pass you by.

LittleBoPeepers · 06/07/2014 23:29

Thanks for all your replies... I need to take a massive chill pill and yes you are right to ask Cabrinha what more could I want? I am asking myself this question too and am unable to answer. I think it is because I can't quite believe my luck in meeting someone who just really floats my boat and he seems normal (ok I know it's not been long) but I feel first impressions say a lot and I feel so comfortable when I am with him and when I see him my stomach does a flip. Having been unhappy in a miserable marriage for ages I suppose I am just not used to all the nice stuff and am getting carried away. Right taking chill pill and giving self a slap. Thanks again all x

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page