Did something daft as a kid, worried now

[stoopidgirl]

This is a bit of an odd, confusing story so please bear with me.

Basically when I was 16 I had a lot of trouble at home and at school, I had no friends, my mum and stepdad made it obvious that I wasnt wanted there and the rest of the family more or less disowned me, it was a really hard time for me.

Around this time I developed a major obsession with the singer of a band, they were well known amongst fans of that kind of music but the adverage joe on the street would not of heard of them. Anyway I met a lad who knew the band, went to stay with him, (didnt meet the band) but came home and for some stupid reason I told everyone that I had met the singer and we really liked each other blah blah and I ended up making up a story about us being 'together', it lasted a few months and everyone seemed to believe me but then people started to question it so I decided to end it 'in style' and told everyone that he had turned violent towards me and I had to run away etc...everyone seemed happy to believe that and as the months/years went by I stuck to this stupid story to cover a period of my life where I had really ran away from home and was living on the streets...as far as they knew I was living with this singer.

Anyway as I grew up, had kids etc the story obviously faded into obvilion and I assumed/hoped that everyone had forgotten about it, turns out they havn't and occasionally mention him to me.

The problem is this man makes himself quite accessible, he allows fans to contact him very easily through his site and answers all email. I am now terrified that someone will email him and either ask him if it was true or tell him all the lies I told about him, I'm terrified he will sue me for slander or something.

I hadn't thought about the story or him for years but for the past few days the worry of it has actually been keeping me awake at night. I know it was wrong and stupid but I was a confused kid at the time, I can't change what I did.

What would you do? I was thinking of emailing the bloke myself and explaining what I did and apologising and hoping he doesnt take it further rather than him finding out from someone else but if I don't bother he may never find out anyway so would it be best to leave it and hope he never does?

Could he sue me if he wanted to? this all happened 10 years ago...am I worrying over nothing?

Any advice very much welcomed.

I don't think he could sue you for something you did when you were 16 - and if he is the sort of person who talks to his fans, he won't even try IMHO. Would you forgive a 16 year old who came and told you they had done that?

I wouldn't worry at all. Cripes, half of us would be in straight jackets if we worried too much about what we did 10 years ago.

Also, you were 16!! This is the designated age to be stupid isn't it. What you did was not a good thing for this other person, but I think it's highly unlikely someone will bring it up now. Probably most people didn't even believe you then as, as you said, lots of them questioned you over it.

I wouldn't contact the person. If the worst happens (and I'm sure it won't), you can explain to him and anyone else who's bothered about it, like you have explained here.

Life is too short to be worrying about these things stoopidgirl.

Thanks everyone. I think the reason I have started to worry about it is because, for the first time since I can remember I am happy, settled and looking foward to a good future and it would be just my luck for something major to come along and wreck it all.

He seems like a nice bloke, I have spoken to him via email a few times (never as myself so he doesnt have a clue who I am) and although he's known for having a very volatile personality he seems like a genuine person who wouldnt unneccessarily hurt someone.

Thing is, he has a major issue with domestic violence which is why I worry about it getting back to him what I said, I think he would be mortified to find out that someone had been going around accusing him of being a woman beater .

Do you really think I have nothing to worry about? I would love to just forget about all this and get on with my otherwise good life.

You would (I imagine) just deny it if it came out - lots of slebs have much more looney fans and stalkers to worry about than some fabricated tale from way back.

The only way to make yourself feel 100% better is to go back to your mates and set the story straight.

Don't beat yourself up though - I also had a tough family situation at that stage in my life and rather strangely also fabricated a whole load of stuff - it's one way a child deals with trauma. You're past all that now - don't let your past haunt you and stop it enjoying the success you've made of your life!

blimey don't worry if he has time to personally answer questions !

SG, I think you should follow your own advice when you say "forget about all this and get on with my otherwise good life". I wouldn't dwell on all this; you were young, you made stuff up - it's not a crime! I'm glad you're happy, and think you should look to the future and not worry about the past. Best wishes.

I couldn't really deny it as it's all of my family that I told too. To come clean with everyone would mean having to admit that I lied to them all and gained sympathy etc for something that never actually happened and again I am on good terms with family now and I don't want to wreck that and end up like it was before.

then don't worry about it

we've all done silly things in our past - it's just coming back to haunt you because you're worried about letting yourself enjoy your life at the moment!

The only thing I wouold do is dismiss it when people bring the subject up. Saying something like "that's in the past now, i've got a lovely family now..." that type of thing and hope that people start to pick up the fact you don't want to talk about it.