Disappointed with friend

[OverTheHandlebars]

I am currently on a 2 week break from university between academic years (medical student so don't get the normal long break) and had planned to spend this time cycling. I bought a new road bike but unfortunately last Friday I had a nasty crash which involved a trip to A and E, but thankfully no broken bones. Since then I've been effectively housebound because my foot was quite badly hurt which is obviously quite disappointing. My main problem though is that I haven't heard from DF since last Saturday. Normally this friend and I text every day and chat often. I'd count her as one of my best and closest friends and in the past we've always been there for each other during difficult times.

I told her about the accident on the Friday by text and she seemed concerned. On the Saturday I phoned her hoping to have a chat to cheer me up a bit but we only spoke briefly as she was going out soon and had to watch Masterchef (I think what she really meant there was that she wanted to spend time with her GF before she went out). Anyway, I'm really hurt that she hasn't asked how I am since. Tbh I could really have used a friend to be upbeat. Even aside from the accident it's really not like us to go so long without contact and I'm confused.

I will admit I decided a couple of days ago to not contact her and see when I heard from her, which I know is petty. We're normally really there for each other when either of us have problems etc so I'm at a loss to say what's going on. Any ideas? Should I tell her that I'm hurt and feel really let down? I don't think I'm being demanding, just would have liked a text asking how I am or something.

Sorry to hear about your accident. You've told your friend about it, you've phoned her (and she kept the call short) - I don't think there's anything more you can do. Is her GF a new one and she's all loved up? Is it possible that there was a romantic spark between the two of you and your accident has coincided with her new relationship so you are not so much a priority? So many possibilities, but the ball has to be in her court. I would avoid the 'I'm disappointed/why haven't you called me ' approach. Observe quietly, draw your own conclusions, bear in mind going forward. Get well soon!

Ouch - sorry this has happened.

You are not wrong to feel let down and hurt. But there may be other things going on now that will become clear later - or she could be being a bit of a crap friend.

Is there anyone else you could call on to cheer you up and give you some TLC? Hope you recover fast.

I think you're being a bit ott here. Do you want her to come and nurse you? I thought not. You're just holed up at home. It's nothing major IMO.

She's probably busy with her gf. If you want her to visit you then just ask her round.

Yes, my first question was going to be is the GF as new or a jealous one?

Thanks for your replies. The GF isn't new and I get on well with her and DF and I have always had an entirely platonic relationship. I'm just confused as to why a friend that is normally in contact daily would suddenly go silent. I'm not seriously hurt or anything but if a good friend had done something similar I think I could find time in a week to send a text saying hi and ask how they are! I appreciate that it probably feels worse than it is because I'm fed up and in pain but I didn't think I was asking a lot

If you are used to daily contact then something must have happened.
Can you text and ask for a convenient time for you to call and discuss this with her.
Let her know you feel hurt by her lack of sympathy and disregard for your health and wellbeing.
It may be that she is going through some problems right now as well and is in need of your support but doesn't want to trouble you while you aren't on top form?

TBH if someone I was in daily contact with suddenly stopped, I'd be thinking "I wonder if they're OK" rather than "why aren't they talking to me?" That said, I can't think of anyone I'm in daily contact with but the same would apply if I didn't hear from someone I was expecting to at any time.

You're all right, there might be a reason. She's doesn't normally hide problems but maybe she doesn't want to be a bother or something. I will text her. I do hope I'm not the one being the neglectful friend!

We'll I texted her asking if I was alright and got a reply apologising for not being in touch. She just mentioned what she'd been up to and asked how I was enjoying my holiday. I think she has forgotten the accident

Sorry, obviously I was asking if she was alright!

Remind her.

Text back saying.
'Holiday? Yeah I wish. Still suffering after the accident but I am getting there. Ankle is getting better and I'm able to get about a bit better now. Hopefully I'll be fully mobile soon. What's going on with you? Anything good planned for the weekend? We need a good catch up soon so let me know when you are around and we'll get something in the diary!'
Done!!! Light hearted - friendly. Not accusing her of forgetting.

Yes, I will reply with something lighthearted like that. No point throwing a strop, I'm sure she's just been busy and my poor foot is not a terribly interesting topic

She wasn't meant to be cycling withyou was she?

No, she doesn't cycle at all.

sorry about your accident but yes, tbh she probably did forget if you just had one brief conversation about it. One of my very good friends got married last week in a private ceremony, miles away. I totally forgot to contact her on the day to say congrats because two other fairly major things happened. Doesn't mean I don't care...just that life got in the way. Definitely go for the upbeat response if you want to preserve the friendship. I have a friend who always blows out arrangements at the last minute and it pisses me off big time but actually, she has some health issues and sometimes really can't help it so I bite my tongue and just say "oh dear, shame". If I blew my top it would eb the end of a 25 year friendship.