Arguments are never resolved

[DollyPS]

We argue and it seems a damn lot the now but they never ever get resolved as in sorted. If I bring some thing up he now has this habit of walking away after shouting and it doesn't get sorted.

I have tried to tackle this head on but nothing and afterwards he thinks nothing has happened.

I was fuming earlier over something and he couldn't understand why and stormed of with ffs at me.

I am just sick of it as nothing is ever sorted and I am beginning to resent it a lot. He won't actually tell me why when I do.

Also what is weird he has begun to check my phone why I have no clues over. He never has done before.

How do you "bring things up" and what are they about?

No-one want to hear "you do this, that and the other blah, blah, blah"

The way things are couched often has an effect on whether a person is listening or wants to.

I have an inkling that things are never resolved because neither of you is actively listening to the other

Agree with bitterandtwisted, it's all in the way you present the problems.

As an example my dp and had a massive row this weekend. Most of it was conducted by phone or text, with a couple of hours of frosty silence in person in between. When we finally thrashed it out face to face he could see that I was sad and upset, not just angry and said that if he'd realised that he would have reacted differently, but because he felt attacked he went on the defensive.

I don't know how much either of us will learn from this latest encounter but I hope that next time I will try to bear in mind that telling him how I FEEL about the situation, rather than accusing him of DOING something in particular might elicit a better and more sympathetic response.

Some context is required. Is this a new relationship or an old one? How long has the bad communication been going on i.e. have things always been the same or is it a new thing? Checking phones is a sign of insecurity, suspicion, or trying to justify bad behaviour. If the bad-tempered stuff is new, it might not be a coincidence