Being a bit pathetic after a breakup...

[CharlieBrookerScowl]

I was the dumper and it was definitely the right choice but it's been 3 weeks (was a 19month-ish relationship) and I'm still feeling all lonely and crap-eating...

Went NC after a week which helped and I am much happier in some ways. I went through a month of wanting to dump him too so had a head start on 'getting over it'.

I know time is a great healer etc but I feel crap this weekend tbh. It passes doesn't it? Never had a long enough relationship before this to really experience getting over a decent-length relationship, besides some stupid melodramatic 'first love' thing when I was 18

Now we've been apart for a good few weeks lots of shitty things he did have come flooding back and made me angry all over again if that makes sense.

I can't actually believe I didn't leave him within in the first few months! I just thought he'd change people don't, I learnt that much and my self esteem (or lack thereof) lowered my standards a bit never a-bloody-gain.

Writing the angry stuff down helps. I felt sorry for him when we first split but he was horrid and got his family involved, sending delightful character assasinations via text etc until I threatened to take it further legally. He was 30 fgs!

You are not being pathetic. Someone who was a huge part of your life is suddenly gone. In some ways, you've got to remake your life. It is normal to feel down for awhile (even if the breakup was the right thing).

Make plans with your friends. Get out and do something interesting/fun. Make a special plan to give yourself something to look forward to. Or just have a cup of tea with someone. Don't spend too much time on your own moping.

Sounds as if you've had a lucky escape.

Can you gather round a few pals just to have a laugh and interrupt your head a bit?

xpost

Not tonight but I have a couple of very good friends I can phone etc. One of which is going through similar! Must be something bastardy in the air

It does feel more like re-adjustment 'pain' than 'missing him' pain. He was here a lot. And it got quite intense towards the end on his part wrt the future.

I'm heading out with friends on saturday which will be great. I find it hard not to feel like the 'bad guy' for being the dumper. Especially with all the crap I had off him/his family/his friends after. Wasn't expecting it, seeing as we're bloody adults!

Doesn't help that weekends are a bit lonely anyway when you're a single parent (he wasn't the father) and I'm also having my first period post abnormal cervical cell treatment (LLETZ) which feels like something that Satan himself designed...

Trying to remember that. And how much happier the atmosphere has been the last few weeks. I might be lonely/still a bit angry but I'm not miserable/being disrespected anymore. I guess that's something!

Cheeky git tried to get me to stay by using my own health issues against me. Who even does that?

He said most men would have run away from a woman with a kid and health issues

No, you and your 'bros' would. Not an actual, decent man...

And did it ever cross your mind that I just don't want to be with you. Regardless of whether or not I meet anyone!