Wills, guardians for DD, WWYD?

[KikiShack]

DP and I (together 10 yrs) have 1 DD, a baby. We decided to do wills to sort stuff out in case we both die so DD is looked after, and the money from selling our flat goes to be looked after by trustworthy relatives etc etc.
We asked my little bro and his wife to look after DD if we die, they were happy to agree. But we needed a second choice guardian too in case they die / are already dead.
My big bro has 5 children so we figured his house is pretty full already. DP's bro and sis are both married, reasonably well off etc but both have stated many many many times that they don't want children, love their nieces and nephews but have no intention of having their own. So we assumed they wouldn't want DD.
So we decided to ask some friends - a gay couple who we see lots, one is a teacher and the other has lots of nieces and nephews he's great with. They're great guys and we love and trust them. They were delighted, said yes of course, everyone is happy.
However then when the Wills guy came round he made us rethink - only one person is named out of the couple so it's obvious for blood relatives, but we weren't sure which of this couple we'd pick - we only want them as a couple! Plus one is American so there's a chance they'd go to live there in the future and we wouldn't want DD brought up so far away from family. Then DP discussed with his sister who said she'd love to be our back-up choice, so we went with her.
Problem is we haven't told the gay guys so they still think they're DD's 'godfathers' and refer to themselves as such. This isn't a title we'd use as none of us are religious, equally we're happy for them to be thought of in that way and called that by DD, but legally they're nothing now. We are too chicken to tell them we chose someone else as we don't want to hurt them. And the chances of it ever coming to pass that we and my bro dies before DD is 18 are so small that I don't know if we ever need to tell them.
DP thinks we should, it doesn't feel right to him to keep lying by omitting to tell them when they something about how someone in their family is so happy they have anew goddaughter that she sent us an outfit. However I think it's never going to be found out, we love them enough to have seriously considered them so what harm is there? I want to write them a letter to store with our wills explaining so that if we do all die at least they have an explanation.
WWYD??? Fess up or keep schtum?

I am not sure I would bother telling them to be honest, although I can see your dilemma! It is so extremely unlikely to happen...

But why don't you have a naming ceremony for your DD & you can make them "godparents" or "sponsors' or any other term you like to use? We did that for both our DC so although we are not religious & we had a non religious ceremony they do have godparents which they really enjoy.

Surely the chances of both you, your DP and your first choice all dying are very small? I would include a letter explaining the change with your wills if you are worried

I'd say since your DD seems to have gained two godfathers, you should have some sort of naming celebration to make it official. Something with champagne and lots of cake

you didn't have a christening, right? so nobody is actually a godparent? Otherwise they'd know it wasn't them.

I'd just carry on as you are. They can still be I don't know what the non religious not actually christened equivalent of a godparent is but whatever it is, they can still be it. They can still be special people in your child's life.

They just aren't named in the will as the people your child will be raised by if you both die and if your first choice dies.

I'd make up something along the lines of being legally advised not to have a non UK citizen as guardian and that you didn't want to pick one out of the couple.

Thanks for replies, DP might be persuaded by the wall of voices all saying not to bother telling them.
Neither of us are keen on a naming ceremony for some reason, maybe the same reason we're still not married after 10yrs and a baby!
sashh that's a good point to play up the American thing, especially since there might move back there, so if DP is still super keen to come clean I will definitely make him compromise by allowing me to weave some of that in.
I'd be really interested to hear the perspective of anyone who thinks we should tell.