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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How do I actually end this marriage?

3 replies

siucra · 25/06/2014 20:35

My DH and I have been married for eight years. He is an alcoholic. It's been a very stressful time in my life. However we really really loved each other and were crazy about each other.
That has changed. He has always been verbally abusive which amazed me - and still does. Last night he told me I have no authority over my DD. That's just one example. Mild to quite unpleasant. He has pneumonia (alcohol induce, I imagine) at the moment and is feeling sorry for himself. He has also been drinking through out his illness. Last night he went to the pub for a match and although didn't stay up until his usual early hours, it was enough.
My thing is that the love that got me over all the bad stuff (I have not been an easy wife) is now rapidly disappearing. I am starting to get excited about not having to live with this albatross/ man.
We work in the same place, desks metres away from each other and now I don't even care about all the gossip.
But how do I do this? What do I do practically. He is quick to anger, very emotional and rarely reasonable. He will not leave. I want to stay with my daughter in the family home.
He will not admit he has a problem, and whenever I have said I want to leave he has told me to go but I am not to take DD.
What do I do? I want an end. I suppose I am scared of another confrontation and after eight years of them, I don't want any more, especially as I don't want to save this relationship.
Thanks for any advice!

OP posts:
EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 25/06/2014 21:07

See a solicitor for legal advice. Good luck.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 26/06/2014 06:30

Definitely get legal advice. Some solicitors offer a free initial consultation and Womens Aid 0808 2000 247 might be able to recommend one locally who has experience with cases where there are additional factors such as alcohol problems and abusive behaviour.

Is the doctor treating him for pneumonia aware of his alcohol intake?

lucy43 · 26/06/2014 08:26

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