Friend's mentally abusive cocklodger is refusing to leave her house. What are her rights?

[Milmingebag]

This is a follow on from another thread I started recently. The good news is my friend has reached the end with this relationship. She is heavily pregnant and he is routinely verbally abusing her and refusing to do even the bare minimum he agreed in terms of housework.He now works 2.5 hrs a day as a cleaner as he lost his morning cleaning job from being an arse.

The facts are that she owns the house. He isn't on the council tax list or electoral role because he refused to go on them.he pays no rent or bills.

She asked him to leave a few days ago which he did (well he stormed out after she hid the modem) and she locked the house up. At two in the morning he scaled onto her flat roof and let himself into the house via the bedroom window in the room she was sleeping.This really frightened my friend who asked him to leave. He refused. He then went onto say that she had ' nobility in her womb but that she was a peasant', at which point my friend locked her self in her bathroom and called the police as he looked unhinged.

The police came and said he had a right to stay as he lives there and because he had done her no physical harm there was little they could do. Is this right?

He ticks just about every box on those emotional/financial abuse checklists but owing to the nature of the abuse it is hard to prove until it becomes physical.

He has a criminal record for domestic abuse-false imprisonment, assault, resisting arrest and on his CRB it mentions that he went for a knife when the police were attempting to restrain him.

He is in her house, ringing helplines claiming he is the victim of abuse and claiming he has a right to a decent period of notice. Her dad is there now keeping an eye on the situation.I think he is unhinged and am going down this weekend to support my friend.

Any advice would be really helpful x

Unfortunately the police have no understanding of civil law. Their training is in the criminal law which is why they didn't forcibly eject your friend's cocklodger.

Your friend is the owner of the property and he is only entitled to occupy it with her agreement. He can quote all the crap from any websites he likes but can be asked to leave with some notice or absolutely no notice at all.

Your friend needs to get onto the police again and tell them that someone is being asked to leave her property and she "fears a breach of the peace" may occur.

If he won't go quietly then he should be escorted out with the police in attendance. However, this may not prevent him attempting to break in again.

The police did take him from the property but explained to my friend they couldn't take the keys off him as he had a right to be there so the next morning he presented at the door. He scared her as he was just standing behind the glass of he front door and when he knew he had been spotted ,he then repeatedly rang the the bell.

Her father came over and let him in to have a chat. He was then asked to go as she had a hospital appointment. When she came back in the afternoon he was asleep on the front lawn and her father let him in again for water. He then started to help tidy up and refused to leave when her dad left them to talk things through. Her dad didn't know the whole story at that point.

So that's how he got back in. I have said she should change the locks today.

She has spoken to a solicitor who has told her the only way of removing him to to get a court order and that can take up to 5 days and cost £3,500.

That's bullshit isn't it?

He would be removed if she told the police he assualted her - she just needs a witness - she may not even need that if she was to give herself a nice red slap mark.......

1. Change the locks.
2. Put all his stuff out.
3. Call the police each and every times he attempts to break into the house.
4. Don't let him into the house for any reason ever.

I cannot believe that a homeowner has to live with another adult person who has no right to the physical property, no ongoing relationship with the homeowner and is in fact threatening and intimidating that person.

But if she is going to leave it so he is working around with keys that can access the house she will be making life difficult for herself.

why would she need a witness though?
If all cases of DV needed a witness or an injury no action would be ever taken.

The police didn't take the keys off him because this issue is related to the civil law. This is not an area the police have any training or understanding of.

What she needs to do is involve the police in a criminal law issue. Which is why I referred to fear of a possible "breach of the peace". She needs to get onto 101 again, tell them that he's already got a criminal record for assault etcetera and that he's been threatening her and she needs him to leave.

She doesn't need a locksmith she just needs to change the BARREL. Replacement barrels for the commonest types of lock can be bought from places like B&Q for about a tenner. It should take about ten minutes to do with a screwdriver. This won't stop him hanging about outside or trying to climb back in through the window. But his criminal record should persuade the police to take her seriously.

I would be milking the heavily pregnant/vulnerable aspect with the police too if that will help them get their act together.

Why on earth does her dad keep letting him in?

Thanks bitter that's really helpful to know and explains their response.

Thank-you everyone else for your advice and support.

*"She has spoken to a solicitor who has told her the only way of removing him to to get a court order and that can take up to 5 days and cost 3,500.

That's bullshit isn't it?"*

Yes, that is complete and utter bullshit!

I don't know how many times this needs to be said: it is her property and no-one has a right to enter or occupy it without her permission. If she wants him to leave he has no right in law to remain. Ergo, there is no requirement for court orders or anything like that to get him out.

She needs to involve the police. They will find his criminal record and current threatening behaviour pretty compelling.

While her father is there they should ensure that the property is not left unoccopied until he has been ejected.

Her dad wasn't aware of his behaviour and what was going on in private. Some people don't understand abuse unless it's physical and explain it away as people having 'difficulties'.

Which flippin' police force said he has a right to stay? Good grief, are they insane?

Tell her to get an injunction and get him arrested if ge breaks it.

No, the police are not insane. Their training is in the criminal law, not disputes about who has the right to enter or occupy private property.

No injunction is necessary. This will be costly and time-consuming in any case. The police need to be called immediately and informed about his criminal record and current threatening behaviour.

Friend and father can report an alleged assault against her or even a vague threat of it to get the police's attention and be asked to provide their attendance to exclude him from her property.

He has gone.

Police domestic violence team have rung and are giving her ongoing support and told her his behaviour is abusive. She said she needed to hear that to validate her decision. Thank goodness there are people who do understand it.

HOORAY! Marvellous news

Your friend has been very brave indeed.

She needs to be extra vigilant now because I fear this won't be the end of it. I hope she and her father are making plans to change the barrels on the locks today. I think she'll need to keep the windows locked shut for a bit, too.

Glad to hear that.
Let's hope that he stays away now.
And make sure she gets on the Freedom Progamme.

She needs to spot red flags much faster and understand she doesn't put up with this kind of behaviour.
Bless her. Glad you are going to see her soon.

Bitter, as he technically broke in after being asked to leave then the police let the OP's friend down when she requested their assistance to remove him. He was breaking and entering.

OP I am glad your friend is receiving support.

Tell your friend to make sure her father knows not to let this man back in again. And change the locks.

There was no "breaking and entering" if you're referring to the episode where he climbed through a window to gain entry. If he'd kicked the door down, you would be right.

I have a feeling that all of this could have been resolved rather more quickly if the OP's friend had disclosed his past history of assault etcetera to the police. However, it's over not (one hopes) and he won't return to harass and frighten her again.

So if a would be burglar gains entry via a bedroom window that isn't illegal?

Does it matter if he gained entry through an open window or a closed one? He was in the house when had no right to be in there.