Stuck. Help me through my to do list.

[Imbroglio]

Posting in here because I have a horrible mental 'block' which is to do with having been effectively excommunicated by my family. I've posted about that under another name. I'm more or less OK at work. It's at home I just feel as if all the energy drains out of me.

Single parent with teens - so I have to function for them. I have no RL support.

I have had almost NC with my family for over a month to give myself a break and things are getting better. But ultimately this isn't going away as my mum isn't well and wants to see me. I wake up in the morning with my heart thumping.

I know I will feel better if I get these jobs done. Some are family related (eg paperwork for my mum - I look after her affairs I need to do this but it makes me feel physically sick after the way my family have treated me). Some are just normal chores.

I have booked some unpaid leave later this summer to sort out some stuff for myself and to spend some time with my children but I'm worried that if I can't get 'unblocked' I'll waste this precious time.

Any support gratefully received!

Right. Now. One of my favourite things.

Use the 7 habits method of working out what to do first.

Get a piece of paper and divide into 4 in a cross.

Top left - 'urgent and important'
Top right - 'not urgent but important'
Bottom left - 'urgent but not important'
Bottom right - 'neither urgent nor important'.

List all your tasks in one of the four boxes. Be honest. Is it REALLY important to iron some skirts for example.

Once you have your list in those four boxes you can allocate them out.

Do the 'urgent and important' first. The aim from now on is to not let anything get to this box as you will do it when it is in the non-urgent box.

Then do the 'not urgent but important' box. This is the holy grail of time management. If you just did everything when it gets to this box, you would have sussed it.

The rest - why are you doing it if it isn't important?

If you feel you have time to do it, concentrate on the 'urgent but not important' box, and never do the stuff that is in the 'neither urgent nor important' box.

stratsolutions.net/tag/time-management/

Good idea! I'm ok with this at work - so I know I CAN do it.

And I know I'll feel better.

I've made a start with something not too emotional - cleared some space. Piles of paper for the recycling aleady.

Yep its the unblocking that I am having trouble with. I am just visualising how happy I will feel when its done.

I'm an obsessive list maker. Sometimes I have 100 things on my list.

For me its partly about seeking some control when life is really shit. I notice that when things are calmer my To Do list is managable.

I wish I'd spent more time with my DC rather than ticking off bits of niff naff on my To Do list.

I'm pretty lazy laid-back in general. I do what I need to do. Not obsessive at all. But when I'm depressed, which I have been for a while, it really stacks up and impacts on everyone.

Like my garage - my son's friend wants to park their bike in there and there is no room because of stuff that clearly needs to be taken to the tip. I'm sure they don't mind or even notice. But I mind. Its not the sort of environment I want to live in.

I have recently devoted a considerable amount of time and emotional energy into sorting out my mum's stuff - selling and clearing her house, sorting out her finances. And have received a massive slap in the face from my family. They have given me no support and treated everything I have done with suspicion. I feel knocked for six.

I think living in chaos is my way of punishing myself.

Can you get help? I wish I had an extra pair of hands or even someone to motivate. Ie keep, chuck etc.
I can't even let people in my house.

Someone to keep me motivated would be great.

How are you getting on?