Is your DP your best friend?

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And do you think he/she should be?

I've been wondering about this a lot recently, probably because in the last year or so I've been lucky enough to make the best friend I've ever had. DH and I are close and happy together and until recently I would have said without doubt that he was my best friend. He's my husband though - we love, respect and support each other but also irritate each other and go through the usual stresses of life and family.

My friend and I just clicked, it's amazing, like we've always known each other and I guess I'm a little floored by that as it's never happened to me before. I trust her to keep my secrets and I know she feels the same. The way we talk is different from the way DH and I talk.

Is this the case with lots of people and I am just coming to this female friendship thing late in life?!

I felt like you did about my dh when I met him. The whole like I have known you my whole life thing. I have lots of female friends but there is no subject ever untouched with dh

No, I don't hold with the idea of "best" friends as an adult. I have lots of friends, some are closer than others, some I share everything with, others not so much.

DH, I share everything he is interested in with. I'm not going to chat about recipes and plants with him, as he'd be bored to death poor chap.

talisa there is a huge difference between bring tired after work and wanting down time and ignoring your partner and being cold while telling them how much fun you've had with everyone else. It's cruel.

But is he not just telling you about his day?

Is he actually being cold and cruel? Or is it just downtime?

Are you at home alone all day and want some company when he gets home?

I'm not being snippy, by the way, just interested. And I really am sorry that you feel this way

My DP and I were part of a close friendships group before we were a couple, so we function as close friends and a couple. We also share quite a few friends.

However, I have female best friends from school and university.
He doesn't seem to have that but does have a circle of male friends from work etc'.

talisa sadly not. It's him telling me how much more fun they all are than me. He tells me they are 'normal'. He's not telling me about his day, he's doing it to be nasty and to make me feel bad. He goes on and on about how much fun they are and how different to me they are.

Then he ignores me to do his own thing as he's been out earning money while I've been sat at home, in his eyes, doing nothing all day (with 12 week old dd, I also do everything he doesn't lift a finger), so he needs to rest (9-5 office job btw which I ferry him to and from in the car, but you'd think he's been down a coal pit for 16 hours the way he goes on).

And yes, I am totally alone. I don't know anyone here at all, so company, a conversation, somebody asking me how I am would be nice. I love dd (also have an older ds) but there is no difference between day/evening/night/weekends for me. I sometimes think I'd be less lonley if I wasn't with him, because he makes me feel lonely iyswim.

Then he is a wanker, Loopy. How dare he try and make you feel like that?

Why don't you start your own thread for some advice

Oh and Talisa I know what you mean. I actually get fatigued (medically) and have some strong spectrum tendencies so can't be the life and soul always. Luckily DH is very understanding and helpful.

I dont think dh is my best friend he doesnt like listening to my problems yet always quick to judge me if i dont listen to his advice on other things works all ways i think in a relationship.