Posted on here a while ago about DH, was advised strongly to kick him into touch but lacked resolve and still limping on.
Now living in limbo - parents NC with DH, which makes it tricky for me to see them. Brother not speaking to me since DH told him he couldn't come round or see my DC. Brother has depression, eating disorder, resents Mum and blames her for all his problems, resents me as I'm apparently the favourite (not true, he was always Mum's blue-eyed boy). He has young DD but still doesn't see any reason to get his shit together and has put SIL under huge strain with his addictive behaviours, too numerous to mention here.
Dad has Parkinson's and, for those of you that don't know, stress makes the symptoms worse. His youngest brother is now in the final stages of a terminal illness too.
As if things weren't bad enough Mum has become extremely depressed but told me she couldn't say why. After some sleuth work on FB, have discovered brother and SIL both posting stuff which shows they're in a bad place. Challenged Mum about it and she admitted the marriage is over but brother has sworn her to secrecy. The selfish twunt. He never tires of saying how much he despises her, but that doesn't stop him venting his problems on her and forcing her to bear the burden alone. I posted an 'are you ok' message to SIL on FB before I knew and he has phoned Mum to interrogate her as to whether she's told me. She's terrified he will cut her off, he's done it before, and has begged me to keep stumm. I'm planning to write him a letter which TBH I should have sent him 10 years ago, telling him he is being cruel to Mum and to me, but emphasising that I love him and am sorry for DH's appalling behaviour. I feel shell-shocked that in 1 year my seemingly perfect family has been reduced to ashes and terribly worried about M and D. How the hell do I get through this? Will I ever have a 'normal' life again and when will I get the courage to leave my self-pitying DH?