Am I right in saying my husband (who has left me) should make his own excuse for not going to our mutual friends wedding?

[kittycat5]

When my husband left me after he decided he didn't love me any more I decided that what I couldn't change I would have to except. I have been extremely reasonable. ..I have been the best ex wife ever....I like as well as love him and don't think he has been intentionally cruel...its just the way it is...However we have been both invited to our friends wedding...The date has been known for over a year....He has told me he now can't get time off work....I understand he doesn't want to go as a couple....but I resent that he thinks it should be me who makes his excuse....am I being unreasonable?

No you aren't. You are no longer together and therefore he can't assume you will pick up the things you might have done as his wife.

I'm seperated and still get on with my stbxh but I wouldn't be doing this for him. The benefits of being seperated mean you don't have to act like his mother any more. Tell him he needs to tell them himself.

Bride and groom should be made aware that you are no longer a couple and do not want to be seated together. It's then up to him to make his own excuses.

No even if you were still married he should be making his own excuses. It's not even a lie. He should phone or message them and say I am really sorry I unfortunately can't get time off work so can't attend your wedding. Hope you have a wonderful day.

Simples

Fucking Hell!! Does he think you will be writing his Christmas Cards too? Sounds like you might have been trying a bit too hard to be the "Cool Ex"?

Let him fend for himself a bit. Don't tell him what to do or what to say, don't spoonfeed him. Just tell him it is inappropriate for you to do this and you won't be telling them.

Thank you thank you all of you!! I thought I was being unreasonable!

Cheeky sod. Does he try to send you his dirty laundry as well?

You need to tell your friend that you are now single and will be coming on your own.