Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I'm an idiot

9 replies

AppleHEAD · 31/05/2014 10:16

My marriage has been awful so long I can barely remember why we ever got together. Day to day life is tolerable because I'm so busy with work and kids and the house. I have a good lifestyle and so I'm can cope with the crap because the kids are so happy.
But I did something stupid... I had a brief emotional and intense affair. He ended it and I am humiliated and so so sad. When I think logically I should have ended it much quicker but I got swept along.
The problem is that I have opened up a world where I briefly felt happy and I think it's highlighted how unhappy I am.
Before anyone roasts me for having an affair I should say I know and I agree. But I don't feel guilty about my husband, I'm sure he is faithful but he is many other things which I think are pretty dire.
I wish I hadn't done it, I feel sad and so embarrassed.
It's amazing how worthless a bad marriage can make you feel and this seems to have made me feel just that little more worthless..
Sorry I'm wallowing in self pity I will slap myself out of it!

OP posts:
tribpot · 31/05/2014 10:18

It sounds like you need to end your marriage. I don't condone what you did, and it sounds like neither do you, but you do have a right to be happy.

pictish · 31/05/2014 10:18

So you probably need to end your marriage then?

LucyInTheSky78 · 31/05/2014 10:21

I agree. If your marriage is that bad and you are that unhappy, you should call it a day.

Rightallalong · 31/05/2014 10:22

End your marriage.

Your kids need to know you are honest and reliable.

hesterton · 31/05/2014 10:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorthEasterlyGale · 31/05/2014 10:23

Have a brief wallow then get practical - if you're miserable, leave. Your kids won't thank you for being the reason you stayed in a miserable marriage.

Are your kids really happy, or do they hide / ignore their concerns and put on a happy face for you, as you do for them?

Rightallalong · 31/05/2014 10:24

Gosh that's harsher than I meant.

My DP's EA turned physical a fortnight ago after a lot of shit and us reconciling.

For the sake of DS who is horrified his dad could be so dishonest, selfish and cruel, I wish he'd never asked to stay and just gone.

Think of your kids - you will probably keep the lifestyle, be happy

AppleHEAD · 31/05/2014 10:28

Thanks...
I know I need to I'm just scared of what's out there.
Luckily I have ten days alone with the kids to think. My husband is off on his second boys holiday of the year. A week skiing and now ten days mountain biking in California.

OP posts:
AppleHEAD · 31/05/2014 10:28

And I do feel bad about what I have done x

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page