bloody cheek

[suburbanjellybrain]

i have been invited out in a few weeks to a b'day bash in london and my dh says he has 'to think' about wether he is able to babysit! bloody cheek dd will be 5m by then and i have not been out on my own AT ALL since she was born... we have also moved to bedfordshire (6m ago) from london to be closer to his family. i have hardly seen any of my friends since we moved i know nobody here. but still dh has to think about wether he can cope with a 2 yo and a 5mo for a few hours on a sat night. dd was as good as gold when my mum babysat for us to go to pics a few weeks ago, i could ask inlaws to take ds for night so he only has baby but in a way i want him to look after both so he has an idea about what it is like. grrr

am i being unreasonable?

"I'll be five minutes at the library," I say, departing the Inferiority Complex for a glorious half hour which counts as Culture and Educational if I stuff a Charlie and Lola book in my bag on return, so doesn't count in the Grand Scheme Of Time Off...

Honestly, it would drive me bats if I couldn't leave the children with their father - what is that all about? How do you remain sane?! How do you get a hair cut or go shopping or meet friends??

LOL at Hunker - I thought that too!

I just tell DH - well, I say "I'm going here, is that OK" (without a question mark) and he says yes. He sends me out by myself when I'm clearly near the end of my tether too Then he proceeds to do everything better than I ever do anyway. Ho hum. Wonder why he puts up with me, really!

What? No Beouf en Vidal Sassoon? No Coq au Boots Own Brand?

you don't know what you're missing

I'm RIGHT THOUGH!!!!

i like pantene chasseur

he does look after ds loads on his own - i don't want to be unfair - but he has never looked after them both alone (that i can recall) - yes i would love a haircut,time to go shoppping without baby etc. i had a bloody nightmare on public transport going to the nearest town today with one strapped on and one in pushchair - but i do demand bf'ing so for the first month or so with new baby a long period would be difficult. Now though she can go much longer between feeds and when my mum looked after them both a couple of weeks ago she went 10 hrs without a feed. so there is no excuse just my utter patheticness - i must say he is brill with son he bonded properly i would say as ds got more active crawling etc. so it no doubt will be same with dd - he is not a reluctant dad i think it is more that he fails to understand how much a break means to me - though the amount of moaning and 'god i need a breaks'i do i fail to see how

how do i remain sane? i don't think i do - none of my close friends have kids so we kind of live in different time zones now iyswim, and the baby friends i had were left behind in london when we moved - need to make some new ones but has been diff start going to playgroups next week and i hope they aren't too cliquey

i think i will try your ideas twig thank you - we always need a grauniad and some herbal essences on a satursay... but i will have to practice looking innocent i think and not look back even once - thank you for combined arse kicking i hope i can do this without any arguements though i fear that is unlikely -

If feeding is a problem do you express at all - could DH do a bottle of the good stuff each day? Sorry if that's a completely o there suggestion to you - my friend's DH sounds similar to yours and she had huge trouble getting her DD to take a bottle of expressed milk but once she'd succeeded it really freed her up as her DH's anxiety about 'what if she gets hungry' had gone (he was still a wuss and called her all the time but at least she was out!)

hi liquid - no problem expressing and dd has taken my expressed milk from my mum in cup so dh hasn't got that excuse i am afraid (ds on other hand would never accept anything but fresh from booby - until took cows milk in cup at 1yo). i still remember dh ringing me while i was out when ds was about 8m just to tell me ds was crying!