can my ex take me to the CSA?

[mrsbrownsgirls]

I'll be brief.
Split last year from ex , we have 2 children together .
They live with me most of the time and with him 2 days a week ( his choice to have them so little)

We were never married.He doesn't officially have parental responsibility as they were born pre that being automatic .

One of the reasons we split was his reluctance to work and I felt I was being used ( I am fortunate to have a job I love that pays well - i work very hard)

I try to be completely reasonable to him about everything but he gets nasty sometimes. He is always complaining about being skint but I know he has turned down offers of work from several friends.

Can he make a claim to the CSA for me to give him money for the times he looks after the children?

Thanks for listening and I hope someone can help me.

Wow. No, he can't. He's useless :(

No he cant because you are the childrens primary carer.

Who claims the child benefit for the children?

OP, this is just a bollocks empty threat from a cocklodger. Money is really his thing, isn't it?

You know the classic thing about trying to reasonable with unreasonable people? You won't get anywhere with him. Laughing in his face might be the most satisfactory option, plus minimising any contact that isn't related to the DC.

No he can't, but please make sure he doesn't try to claim the child benefit, that's how they assess who is the primary carer.

nope ...Let him try ....

I agree... call his bluff. In the meantime, has the access been formalised legally or is it just something you've worked out between you? If it's informal at the moment, that could be something to consider as a way to cement your position as resident parent.

BTW not surprised you split from him! What a leech

thank you all, you are wonderful.

I am very relieved.

Cogito, everything is informal but I don't forsee any problems. It was his choice to have kids only on set days . I have made it clear from the outset he can have them at his whenever he likes.

I am trying to be utterly reasonable but as Kalidanger has said you can't be reasonable with unreasonable people.

And yes he was a leech and splitting with him was the best move I ever made. I now have a wonderful new boyfriend which I think is the root of ex's nastiness.

neither of us claims child benefit , I earn over the limit

Claim it now. Immediately and then tick the box that says you don't wish to receive payments. If he puts a claim in they will give it him as no one currently claims it and then he will be able to take you to CSA.

You will then on paper be the resident parent who claims CB, but opting not to receive it means you don't go have to go through the rigmarole of paying it back.

yes woodburner makes a very valid point..

A friend of mine claims it but doesn't receive payments as her husband earns over £60k. She is SAHM and needs to be claiming on paper to protect her pension. This DOES NOT happen automatically, you have to claim and then either pay back or opt to not receive.

seriously woodburner?
In the past when we were together before the earnings threshold was introduced, he claimed CB because he was a non taxpayer ( didn't have a job/income)

As soon as the rules came in he opted out.

So can I now apply and tick the box that says not to receive payments?

also re CSA , someone else has assured me he CAN claim, for the proportion of the week the kids are with him . CAn that be true?

As you're getting quite a lot of conflicting information I think you might benefit from legal advice. Unlike the divorce process, it's easy to overlook the legal stuff when there's no formal relationship to finish.

Shouldn't you put a csa claim in from him. You are the primary carer.

Even if he is not working and they say he doesn't have to pay anything at least it's all documented there when if he gets a job.

If he could claim CSA for his two days a week, he'd have to pay you for the other five, wouldn't he? Of course he can't claim! (Though he should be paying you, even if it's only £5 from JSA.)

Ive just looked up the online CSA payments calculator.
It looks like he CAN claim for the 2 days !!

I cant claim from him for the 5 days as he earns below the threshold

The CSA calculator seems to have nothing whatsoever to do with who is the primary carer. It asks how many days a week the child stays with the parent who is paying .

Even more reason to get legal advice on how to establish yourself as the resident parent. Just because something is possible, it doesn't follow that it would necessarily apply to you.

e CSA uses CB to determine who is the resident parent. If he is claiming it and goes to CSA, they will assume that he is the RP if he gets the CB. As far as I know, they are supposed to use lots of information to determine residency, but in practice CB = residency. I would claim it if you can.

He may give up once he finds out he has to pay a fee just to apply.

Don't panic, i am a stepmum and we have the kids 3 days a week. Which means that DH has to pay 18% of his salary divided by 7 times by 4.

We do not get 18% of his ex salary divided by 7 times by 3 (and nor should we - I'm just making the point).

What you do need to do is get the Child benefit in your name, that's how they decide who the resident parent is. You don't have to claim it, but it needs to be in your name.

No, you have them the majority of the time. As the primary carer you can use CSA to get money from him not the other way around.

itsbetterthan a box, I think you are correct!

this from CSA website:

"The ‘paying parent’ is the parent the child doesn’t live with. The parent or carer they live with is the ‘receiving parent’."

However their online calculator is very confusing as I entered the details as if I was my ex , and the last question is how many nights a wek do the children stay at the paying parent's house,( ie me in this theoretical example ) and the option of more than 3 days is given .

Im going to apply for CB!