Okay, we are starting to get to the bottom of things.
Last year there was a big fall out over some stuff. DH and I were accused by his mum of taking things that weren't ours and that belonged to his sister. We were in fact storing them until his sister could come and sort them out with DH (this was two cardboard boxes of bits and bobs such as glasses, vases, ornaments, etc that SD passed on to DH and asked him to sort out with his sister who wanted what. There was nothing of any real value and SD had nearly chucked the stuff out.)
DH's mum kept going on about these boxes and was desperate to see what was inside them and numerous times asked me where they were and what was in them. Each time I said that I had no idea (I didn't, I knew they were in our house somewhere like the garage or the attic but I didn't know what was in them and AFAIWC they were nothing to do with me). Indeed they were nothing to do with my MIL - this was stuff her ex husband was giving his DD and his stepson and it was up to the two of them to sort out. I think MIL must have been convinced that there was valuable stuff like family silver or goodness knows what.
So one day, probably a few months after we had started storing these boxes, SIL comes down for a visit and stays at her mums. DH mentioned to her that she might want to come and have a look at the boxes of stuff and see what she wanted (we had not even opened the boxes as DH was waiting to go through the stuff with his sister). In the afternoon MIL calls me and announces that she and SIL are coming over to sort out the stuff. I suggested that they come another time as DH wasn't home and it actually wasn't very convenient for me plus the boxes were nothing to do with either me or MIL.
They came over anyway but a bit later on. MIL asked me to get the boxes and I told her I didn't know where they were (I honestly didn't we had just moved house and hadn't unpacked all our own stuff, we have a big garage and attic and there were boxes in both.) Also I didn't think it was right to have MIL and SIL going through this stuff without DH there as the stuff had been very clearly given to both him and his sister.
DH arrived back from work and MIL was already a bit worked up and basically had said that she thought I was lying about not knowing where the boxes were. She is very materialistic and lives in a massive house bursting at the seams with stuff. I imagine it was beyond her to believe that I had no interest in these boxes of knick knacks.
So anyway things went from bad to worse with MIL jumping on DH the second he got in the door and demanding to see the boxes (by this point I was realising that she was convinced that DH and I had probably already gone through them ourselves and taken "the good stuff". In other words that we had stolen things that she sees as her daughter's).
The three of them went to our garage and DH pulled the boxes out, I was in the kitchen feeding the DC and also just keeping out of the way as it was nothing do with me and I could see that things were already tense. I suggested that MIL stop in the kitchen with me and offered her a glass of wine as I could see where things were going. MIL has form for being very grabby, she covets things and can never have enough.
She ignored me and went through and started rummaging through the stuff and telling her DD what she should take and saying things like "take that it's valuable" (I think this was over about 4 mismatched odd crystal glasses). DH asked her to stop sticking her nose in and let his sister go through the stuff herself. MIL accused him of not wanting his sister to have what was rightly hers and said that she was there to defend her daughter against us. Wow! DH asked her to get out the garage, they all came through to the kitchen where I was with the kids and were raising their voices at each other so I told them to get the hell out of my house and take their argument into the garden as my DC were upset and trying to eat their dinner.
SIL just stood by pretty passively and let her mum accuse her brother and I of taking things that belonged to her, in other words stealing. DH asked them to leave. They went off and then a few days later DH dropped all the stuff off at his mum's and said he wanted nothing more to do with it.
When all this was happening DH spoke to his step dad and explained that it had all gone tits up and SD said he would have a word with his daughter just to clarify that he had passed the boxes on to us and asked us to hang onto them until a moment where DH and his sister could sort them out.
These boxes have been brought up by SD over the subject of his will and he has said that considering what a mess all that was it is better all round if DH receives nothing on his death. It turns out that MIL and SIL told him that we stole the stuff.
So there we go. Over a couple of boxes of junk, DH is being hurt and insulted by his mother, sister and SD. He's a thief who steals his step family's things and I'm a liar and his accomplice.
Sorry for the essay, I needed to get that out.
Nadia, thanks for your kind words. DH and I are glad to have each other and our family and our values.