More girth than I can deal with - can I do anything?

[TwirlingElephant]

I promise I'm not taking the piss or trolling or anything. I've name-changed because I wouldn't usually post about something so personal - either about myself or my DP.

OK - basically - new DP. He is truly a gorgeous, wonderful person, and whatever happens I love him and want to be with him.

We've recently started being physically intimate - but basically (and this is embarrassing) - he has more "girth" than I am accustomed to on a man - so much so, that we haven't been able to manage penetration, because, not to put too fine a point on it - we can't get it in...

This has never happened to me before - though I think he has had issues in the past. Is there anything I can do to be able to "accommodate" him - or will we just need to accept that penetrative sex isn't possible? (It wouldn't be the end of the world, as everything else is fantastic)

Having had a baby and given birth vaginally, I am a bit bemused that this is a problem at all (in birth, does the vagina dilate in the same way as the cervix? Feel daft for asking this, but it's not making sense at the moment).

Apologies for any TMI here - I am nervous to google about this as I really don't want to be accidentally pulling up dodgy porn sites - I just want factual info!

Thanks

The vagina does stretch, absolutely. You need patience, lots of lube, lots of foreplay.

Some positions are probably better than others - anything where your knees are together, or close to together, will not be good.

If it can fit a baby out it should be able to fit a penis in. Patience and lube. Lots and lots of both.

it is difficult, personally I have always been able to get more pleasure out of average even small cocks to big ones.

I did have a very eager bow in my early 20's with the biggest penis I ever saw, truly massive in length and girth, he wasn't even a big guy, we did after a lot of preperation manage to get it in but it never gave me a lot of pleasure. Still it was nothing compared to the horror when he wanted oral sex!

In the end we split up before he split me.

Some men strugle to have sex because of their large manhood, there was a TV show on C4 years ago about it. They have to seek out specialists called "size queens" to accomodate them.

I went out with a guy briefly before dh who was extremely well endowed. I mean it was huge. We only tried sex once but since I'd only been with one other guy before who had a very small penis I was a bit nervous about sex when I met the other guy. We only managed oral, he didn't seem phased/surprised that we didn't go all the way, I assume he had that reaction before. As the others said lots of lube, foreplay, maybe some wine before the first go. Good luck

How wide

erm... not sure - haven't suggested measuring it... (think he might get a bit self-conscious if I did... )

thanks for the thoughts folks - suppose we'll just need to keep trying... Any other ideas welcomed too...

I thought you were talking about his belly! :D

I once dated a man whose cock had the girth of a full size aerosol can of deodorant.
It didn't last and that was in part down to his penis.
He was actually quite embarrassed about the size of it.

Poor you OP, gosh what bad luck!

Any chance of a picture? ;)

littlemisssarcastic - I bet he was.
I wouldn't be embarrassed if mine was like a bottle of domestos with a sheep's heart on the end.

Size 12 boot stretcher?

hahahha daisy

I had this problem with DP at first, starting with oral (on you) helps loads!

But seriously OP I have been in this situation and the solution is do it when you feel really up for it. You say he is gorgeous and a wonderful person -- but are you sure you totally fancy him?

Get him to bring you off first or make sure you're turned on to the point you're desperate.

Put a no penetration ban on for the minute and fill your boots having fun instead. It'll happen.

Thanks folks. I'm definitely sure that I totally fancy him. I am able to orgasm with him - just in other ways - and when we tried penetration, I was absolutely, totally up for it (turned on to the point of desperate is a pretty accurate description actually).

This whole 'big-penises-should-fit-if-babies-can' idea baffles me. I know vaginas are designed to have babies come out of them, but let's face it, babies coming out bloody hurt! Who wants to be stretched like that during sex?!

I have no suggestions other than lube and being turned on, and you've tried both of those.

Are you having any problem getting turned on? The vagina loosens/opens up when aroused.

Just read your update, sorry.

Maybe buy three or four dildos in caring girths. Use them together build up your sizes, end with the biggest, then try and take him?

Varied girths*

Maybe try a bigger vibrator and try that first?