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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

PND and other recognised health issues not withstanding, do you think you were a bit of a manic loon in the few weeks after giving birth?

11 replies

suzywong · 28/08/2006 16:04

I was at the big playground today and there was a dad and his little boy, about 3 running around, boy was in a Spiderman costume with a plastic mask racing around having fun.
Then mum comes along, vey small baby jammed into a Baby Bjorn and starts laying down the law to the 3 year old that he must take off the mask as it wasn't safe, he couldn't see properly he must take it off or they would all get in the car and go home immediately!
She was ropable, small boy in a pool of tears, bewildered that the day out had disintergrated to a shouting battle of wills, dad was in the background looking helpless and embarrassed.
Anyway, none of us innocent bystanders intervened despite the tears and when it abated I remembered that I had episodes like that when the kids were very young
What I mean to say is, does anyone else who has come through the other side of post partum-dom now recognise the flying off the handle aspect and how it made your partner and your other kdis feel? It must have been very hard on the rest of the family for the first few weeks and I could not through stones at this women on account of having lived in the same glass house for a fair few weeks

Or am I a loon? Anyone else recognise this scenario?

OP posts:
moondog · 28/08/2006 16:33

lol
Yes

I ordered a kind friend who was out for awalk with me and wanted to push the pram not to direct it at oncoming traffic.

I forbade my sister to walk across the livng room with newborn in her arms.

I seriously wondered if ther was any way calving knives could jump out of a closed draw and stab her.

tooz · 28/08/2006 17:45

My lovely DH orgainsed surprise 30th for me weeks after giving birth. All my fab friends and family came and it was a great do. However I hated every minute. Having previously been the life and soul the change to being mum and all that responsibilty was just too much. I cried all the next day and told my DH that he should never orgainse another surprise again and how selfish he was. I am not entirely sure he knew who the hell had swapped his previously sane and normal wife for a madwoman but he took it all in his stride. The down side is he was never very good at surpises before and I think my hormonal rant may have put him off for life!! Nobody warned me I would feel like that.

Flamesparrow · 28/08/2006 17:52

Oh god yes. But then I am always fairly odd .

Sobbed hysterically about a lack of flowers from anyone other than Psycho, have since discovered that I got myself in a state after DD's birth that I had too many flowers and I couldn't cope with them, so my mum tactfully suggested to people no flowers this time .

YeahBut · 28/08/2006 18:15

God yes, complete nutter. Hormones + sleep deprivation = complete lunacy.

motherinferior · 28/08/2006 18:18

Oh yes. A combination of acute panic and sleep deprivation combined with 'wtfkingf have I done' made me quite, quite bonkers.

FloatingOnTheMed · 28/08/2006 18:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

suzywong · 29/08/2006 06:06

OH jolly good, so not just me

Looking back I feel so sorry for DH, if they intervene they get shot down in flames if they don't it's the same. And like the boy I witnessed in the park, I 'm sure I was quite irrational with ds1 at times too

It's a wonder how second children in quick succession come about, given the loon state of most of us

OP posts:
threebob · 29/08/2006 07:13

I couldn't walk across a room that had ds on the floor in case I fell and smashed his head open. I was that rational.

The mum in your case sounds very tired, dad sounds like he had it about right - getting involved would have been an even worse move.

FloatingOnTheMed · 29/08/2006 08:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

suzywong · 30/08/2006 01:18

I can understand the survival mechanism aspect very well, but now, 3 years later for me, I can see it from an outsider's and a dad's POV and I felt so sorry for the bloke. You're right, he just could not get involved.
Poor fathers

OP posts:
threebob · 30/08/2006 18:55

I was having a lovely time at the zoo yesterday with ds, another woman had a child the same age and crucially a baby and was practically beside herself, despite the fact that the baby was just sitting in the buggy and her daughter was doing pretty much the same as ds. She had her mother with her and she was getting the same verbal abuse.

It's an effective contraceptive alright!

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