I came across to this, perhaps I was looking for related issue that I have now too.
My story was I married my husbandtwice.First, he cheated on me when my son was only three weeks old right after he got back in Iraq.monthss later i could tell we were going downhill.hethen told me that he doesnt know what he wantanymore.Hedumped me for another woman then the woman dumped him. When he realized I was moving on dating another guy, he suddenly came in the picture and try to win me back. He manipulated me which was I didn't know then till now from using our son. Yes I went back to him because of my son. 2nd marriage around d I caught him flirting on fb/online and they're not woman who live across the state/country in fact they're senior high school going to his office. He was an army recruiter that time. I run away for a day but then went back with him again. I told him that what he's been doing was dragging me back in our past which I was trying to move forward.
I tried to focus on myself, get my education and got a job but it seems like our issue still hunt me every time I see him flirts. I couldn't leave him either because he was a good provider and a good father but not a good husband. Yet I compare him with my dad who was worst. I almost suck the situation on where I just have to accepted his behavior for the sake of my son. Tho i started building resentment towards my husband from everything, I tried to fit on his needs and bent backwards for him cause I know he's leaving us again for deployment. Until LATER ON I MEET THE OM IN THE CLUB. When I can sense that he like me I told him right away about my status and when we get to know each other through text. I tried so hard to stay friends, just plane friends in the fact that I don't want to brake my family. But I can't deny I started to have feelings for this guy just by texting so I went and meet up to watch movie with him and I feel very uncomfortable. Nothing happen nor touching my hands but I felt really wrong. We have related problem about cheating that's why he divorce his ex of 12 years in marriage. I on the other side was being practical and honestly at first I thought he is just the same man who also lie. That's how my mindset that men are all the same. Lier and cheaters so why leave my husband? Since he meet me he was trying to reach out sending poems everyday. And was telling me that not all are like that. He also told how he feel about me and he just want me to know so he won't regret it. I'd been with my husband for 4 years on our second marriage and I feel never appreciated by him. When my husband told me about his buddies that theyre wives caught them cheated three times they forgave them. I don't know what the message about but I can sense his about to do something 3000 miles away. I went to his fb and Skype and prove enough he was screwing his private on top of that I waited to confront him cause our anniversary is coming up and he totally forgot about it. This was the third time in our 2nd marriage he did it. Al though since I can only prove through texting he said that is only flirt and nothing happen. On that time I said to myself that I'll just go ahead and go outside the box like him but I am more emotionally involved. So I went in and date the OM. He treated me like a princess.
But my problem is my husband still wanting me back and manipulate me and using my son which my deepest weaknesses. I let him use it to me before but I couldn't do it now cause I'm strongly in love with the OM. I also have trust issue that it affect my relationship with the OM but he was still holding on to me. I never been treated like this OM treated me this way.
But I'm also scared that my son will hate me cause he love his dad and be didn't know the whole truth.