Apologies for any typos, I am on my phone.
Long story short my DM's mother is an absolute arsehole. She is generous but to be honest that is where my compliments end.
She was physically and emotionally abusive to her children. I am amazed that they talk to her. My DM in particular was badly affected. They have gone NC over the years but have been in contact without (massive) issue for the last 3/4.
Some of her other kids do their best to avoid her but they are in contact.
After meeting up for family stuff today I think I've had enough. I'm a single adult woman, there's no one else to think about so it should be an easy decision. I don't see her often anyway. Problem is that if I essentially stop talking to her, because she won't have any idea, she will probably (when she does realise) take it out on other relatives. If I keep in contact the good thing is that all the family know what she's like. We stick up for one another as best we can but she is quite a bulldozer.
Should I just keep pretending everything is fine and maybe risk myself a little bit in biting back harder next time she makes a cruel comment, stay quiet and let it go (she's almost 70?) or attempt to stop all contact and not worry about the repercussions.
For those of you with adult children, would you feel upset with one going NC with your parent(s)? My DM is obviously perfectly aware what she's like but I wouldn't want to make her feel guilty as if it's her fault for exposing me to her.
Thanks.