Is it on or not to flirt with strangers when you are in a committed relationship ?

[IHAVEALIVERABBITINMYCRACK]

One my friend thinks it's on and I don't. I'd like to know what others think ? Am I uptight ?

I don't think the word 'flirt' is very helpful to this discussion really because I think what you describe op is inappropriate sexual behaviour. No partner is going to be happy with inappropriate sexual behaviour but I find it difficult to understand really what flirting actually is. Imitating sexual attraction without intent can definitely be inappropriate sexual behaviour because others don't always know your intent. It is especially inappropriate where there is an imbalance of power eg where the other person is elderly, very young or has feelings for you for example. I think it is more helpful to think about whether something is appropriate or not. In this case it clearly isn't is it?

I agree it depends. If it is sexual flirting, then I would say not on, but if it is generally being playful then that is okay and I envy people who can do this. You can flirt with everybody, from people of the same sex (if you're heterosexual IYSWIM) to young children, ie engaging with them beyond necessary interaction. I think people like this get so much further in life.

I once knew a guy who did this with everybody and he could charm the birds from the trees. We went to Wimbledon with crap tickets, and after a quick conversation with the guy guarding Centre Court managed to get us in to watch the match. I still don't know how the hell he did this but I was in awe!

I used to think my DP was flirting with every woman he met, flashing lovely smiles and having friendly chats with supermarket cashiers, waitresses etc. then I noticed he was the same with men.

His job involves charming people and he just automatically goes into that mode with everyone.

The proper stuff he saves for me and if there were any hint of sexually suggestive flirting I'd have his balls.

I think thats the difference, Charm and flirting, well all try the charm from time to time.

It does depend for some people flirting is just their way, and nothing is meant by it but it can be risky, who knows when the spark will strike but that can happen anyway, there is no way to guard against threats not fully.

As others have said, it depends what the individual couple are happy with. Both me and DH are big flirts. It doesn't bother us at all when the other does it, but that's our relationship and within one of our friendship groups flirting is the norm.

I try to be careful and not give the wrong signals but if I didn't want to ever exchange a bit of twinkling as my grandmother called it, I'd certainly find life a bit duller.

I have been married a long time and am happy to stay that way so I know where to draw the line. My DH is not uptight and can charm the birds from the trees but had a former gf who delighted in flirtatious behaviour and he was made miserable by it so I knew from the outset he would find it hurtful if I was too heavy-handed.

Surely it depends on the circumstances - risky with a stranger or anyone drunk. But deadly with a close colleague or a neighbour, and a sibling or friend's partner is off-limits.

its just gossip though, imo, if it is happening in front of him, he says nothing but other people dont approve
some men get off on that kind of thing
some men actively encourage partners to do it
some couples are in open relationships
who knows?
it isnt hidden from him so the choice of what to do about it is his
no need for shocked moralising by bystanders