Lonely and stressed

[samosadj]

My husband of 20 years left me and our two young children last year. He was awful to me for quite a while afterwards but we can tolerate each other now. Trouble is I had to leave my home, move 250 miles to be nearer to my job (he was my childcare), leave all my friends behind and family. He forced the sale of our house, which was very sad and I had to leave my dog behind as the landlord wouldn't let us bring him. I feel like I should be over it by now and I know we've done pretty well - kids are settled, I've bought a new house etc, so why do I stil feel awful. I miss my marriage, not necessarily my husband, and I hardly know anyone in the village. I have to work long hours so it's hard to meet anone here and I always have the children to look after. I have struggled to find childcare (husband didn't move near us) and it feels like I take one step forward and then always two steps back. I try to be positive but its so hard all the time. Will it ever get any better???????

Oh gosh. It is still such early days. Cut yourself some slack and give yourself some very big hugs and and .

When you start to move on it will get easier.

Yes, it will get better. Hang on. And do some online dating.

I guess you are missing adult conversation and company.
It is hard to be a lonely parent. You can get used to it.
It has taken me 4 years.

On a point of information samosa, I'm puzzled - how come your job was 250 miles from where you were before? You must have changed jobs - but why so far from friends and family, on your own with the DCs? You mention a landlord so I presume you're renting - any scope for a re-evaluation and move back to nearer 'home'?

Thank you all - my job had been a long way from home for a few years - we all used to live nearer and only moved because my husband changed jobs - I had to commute to work every couple of weeks and my husband would look after the children whilst I was away. Once he left I lost my childcare. It's hard to find people who could stay two nights a week. He was not capable (and showed no interest) at that time. Even ow a year later he has the children for a little as possible. Plus the children couldn't cope with me being away all the time so I had to move so I can now see them every evening. I needed to keep my job - it's the one stable thing in my life.

Not ready for dating yet -but will eat cake and will sign on here more often